Oh so Lonely

I feel unclean

🚫Warning mature content ahead🚫

I shook my head and smiled lightly, "Of course, why not." I let out a soft laugh as he walked into my apartment. "Hmm, you got a really nice place. We're are your mom and dad?" I frowned slightly, but not enough for him to tell, "I don't live with them anymore."  He smiled gently and hugged me, "Perfect."

I swallowed the lump in my throat as he drew his hands down my waist and looked at me, he pulled his face closer to mine. He closed his eyes so I closed mine tightly, his face was just inches away. I could feel my heart beating faster and faster every second.   I felt his soft lips meet mine, I froze. I had no idea what I was doing I've never kissed anyone before.

He placed his hand on my cheek and started to kiss a bit deeper, I just went with it. Trying to follow everything he was doing, he added tongue and that's when I really freaked out. I just wasn't expecting it but I intertwined mine with his, as his hand began to slide up my shirt.

He unclipped my bra and felt me up, I was loosing so many firsts, all in one day. We made out as I lead him to my bedroom, I don't know why I was so surprised by all this. This was all part of our agreement we made. He slide my shirt off and I slide my already unclipped bra off. He began to unbutton his pants, and I did the same with mine.

After he had finished sliding his shirt and pants off, he took mine off for me. I blushed a bright pink and asked, "Can you turn the light off im embarrassed..." he smiled, "Of course." he shut the lights off and slide of my panties. My heart was beating out of my chest. I wasn't expecting his but it felt good, I didn't feel lonely like usual.

He took his boxers off and slide a condom on, he pressed his tip against me and pushed it in slowly. I teared up a bit and grabbed his hand tightly. Once he put the whole thing in he sat there for a moment to let me adjust. Once I was used to it, I said in a whisper, "You can move." he began to move slowly and picked up the pace as we went on.

I held him close and moaned out in pleasure, my heart was racing. This was so much for one day. After about 40 minutes of it he came and pulled himself out. He left after we watched a movie. But I felt so used, so unclean. But then again I was being used, he didn't like me but then again I didn't like him. We were simply using eachother and of course it helps with the loneliness but still, is this right?