If We're Not Meant To Be

To Yaya

"Nggrh!" She spaced out again as she unconsciously threw everything out on her table.

"Y-Yaya?! Are you okay?" That familiar voice she grow up hearing rang next to her.

This made her stuttered to her great surprised, "I-I-I-I...." She ran out of words to say. She wanted to hit herself.

Seeing him threw a worried look to her, he said, "You have been acting very strange lately, Yaya. Are you really okay? And your face looks red. Are you sick? You should've stayed in your room. You are always busy with the paper works,"

She was just looking at how perfect he is as always. How he would be so kind to her, how he worries about her, all because she was his friend. Just a friend. Nothing more. He is just being Boboiboy.

She did noticed that she was looking at him for quite a long time, so Boboiboy just gave her a smile. He put his two hands on her shoulders as he let her sank again on her swivel chair. He sat on her table hoping she won't be angry.

Yaya was still spacing out. And looking deep in her once lively eyes, something Boboiboy had found was only deep sadness. He asked again quietly, "Yaya. Tell me what's wrong,"

That made her avert her gaze from his eyes and he heard her stuttered again. "I-It's okay. I'm okay,"

"Come on. We both know you aren't," he pressed which made Yaya feel furious inside, but she covered it by silently sighing her frustrations out.

"Well..." She looked down and started fidgeting her hands, "Someone I know will also get married soon, too,"

"Aren't you happy?"

"I am." She sighed, fighting back her tears to come out. "B-But... Thinking about it deeply, I feel- I feel sad."

"Why?"

Closing her eyes and then opening them to look at his, she bravely said, "Because I love him. And- I haven't even told him how much he means to me. How much I really do love him. So now... He's going to marry someone dear to me too. I-I know I should be happy. But I can't stop feeling..." She struggled to find the right words, "I can't stop regretting on the things which I wanted to say to him." She was surprised she was not crying.

Boboiboy pitied his friend. He reached out and gave her a pat on her head. "Yaya..." He was also finding what right words to say, "That's very tragic. I'm sorry to hear that."

Those words from him made her feel little. Unconsciously tracing the lines of the hijab on her head, Boboiboy sighed. Lol. You think he was too dumb not to notice Yaya's feelings? But he was also not an assumer because he had always thought that she was really just a very kind and a nice friend. But now, even if she won't tell directly to him how much she feels, he knows she is struggling. 

The pink hijab woman was surprised when his touch went to her now wet cheeks, "Yaya. I'm very sorry. But it's too late."

Hearing those, tears uncontrollably came out simultaneously from her eyes. "I know. I am sorry too, Boboiboy."

He could not bear to see her like this. He stood up and went near her and hug her tightly. She was just so careless on her letters. Even though it was crumpled, Boboiboy had managed to open what's inside the unwanted paper. Now, realizing that she also love him more than his feelings, he wanted to disappear. 

I will always love you  Boboiboy. And even if it hurts to still hold on about the what-ifs of us, maybe one day I can get over you. But not today. Maybe not just yet. The crumpled letter he found out from the trash bin one day made his world stop.

Boboiboy was caught in between marrying Ying or staying with the one who he thought looks at him as her friend.

But he have to choose. He hugged her crying figure tightly, "If that someone happens to be me, can you say it to me personally, Yaya?" 

He could feel her shaking figure froze. She let go of the hug they shared and snatched the nearby tissue on her table. Averting her eyes, she stood up and gathered all the courage she hope she did before things went messed up. "I love you." She breathed in and repeated, "I love you, Boboiboy! I love you! But... It's too late. Everything." She shook her head and tears started rolling down but she managed to give him a happy smile, "But I have to accept everything. The regrets. I can be okay. Not now, but soon. All- All I want to wish you is that..." She breathed hard again, "Please don't hurt Ying. She is my best friend, and you are too. Just be happy. Don't mind me. I can," she wiped her tears. Dang. She looked despicable. Oh my god! "I can let go with this."

Boboiboy's sad stare went to the metallic floor. Why is everything becoming complicated? The feelings he repressed just for her suddenly came rushing out like a mad tidal wave. He can't even reply to her remorse. 

"Don't give me that look. You don't have to pity me." She added, sniffling. This confession is belittling her. She doesn't understand why his brown eyes were so... Sad and in deep pain. Was it because of pity? She shouldn't have confessed. This confession is messed up!

Preparing to leave, Yaya sighed deeply and gave him her best happy smile. "Don't worry about me. It'll get by." And then she left him in that work room they had shared.

"Hey Tok. How real and deep could a girl be in love?" He remembered asking his late grandfather few years ago.

He smirked, "Depends on how much she deeply feel for you. Your late grandmother once said that a girl's feelings, when nurtured over the years, go stronger that it's even impossible for her to forget that love. You see, women are really emotional. But they see the world in a different way men does. They are like rare gems- so exotically beautiful." He smiled towards the sky as he remembered his late wife, "Impossible to forget."

Young Boboiboy scrunched his brows, "Really? How can you tell that grandma deeply loved you, Tok?"

He smiled, his eyes closing in great happiness, "You can feel it, my grandson. You can feel that girl's overflowing love come washing over you- so full, so pure, so deep... She will do everything just to see you happy, even sacrificing her love."

"Huh? Sacrifice her love?"

Tok Aba dismissed his grandson's deeply confused feature with a laugh, "Oi. Are you liking someone? Couldn't you just ask how boys fall in love instead?"

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*crying in the corner*

Gosh. Oh gosh. Don't come hating me BoYa fans. You're too many against my remorseful feeling.