Losing It

Getting to the problem

I always thought something was strange with me. Most people feel like that, right? The constant feeling of 'Why am I like this?'. I can tell you now, don't even worry about it. Well this is the 34 year old me speaking, not the 16 year old me being prepared for the news that would ultimately shred my life apart. As a teenager, you're really not prepared for it- periods, lack of and the amount you would have and don't forget the fuckboys. Only back in my day they weren't fuckboys, they were just &@&££!

Secondary school was a gas, I loved every minute of it. Yeah, it was an all girls school and a Catholic one at that but it was a big part of my life that I can honestly say it made me the person I am today. Too much?! Yeah okay, enough of that!

So back to the story! Every other girl in my class and year was having their period, it was really annoying me. They spoke to each other about everything- tampons and all those dirty puffy towels with wings. Like wtf- plasters with wings?! I know it's mundane news but it's a sign of womanhood and starting to cross over into the big world. At first, I never recognised the symptoms- the heavy periods that lasted two days, being doubled over in pain, the awful facial hair, the puppy weight then no period for months. Months? Make it 9 months! Basically that is a baby and it was never happening! Mum had enough, it was doctor time. I can only cringe thinking back to the moment....Sitting there with mum and the doctor asking had I participated in sexual activities?! Yo, dude- I'm 16 I hadn't even kissed anyone. More embarrassment but it never entered my head doing any of that!

Till this day, that appointment will forever be my cringe moment!

N.B the above picture is in Belfast! Divis/Blackmountain.

N.B.B tell me what you think!