r.l. - lost in the mental estate

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I sat up, hunched against the wall of this padded cell purgatory I'd been forced into, I kept hurting myself on the concrete walls of my previous quarters, intentionally of course. I stood immediately at the sound of footsteps approaching - I'd gotten used to moving with my arms bound against me. This whole time I'd been muttering to myself, only now at the sound of someone approaching they turned into desperate yells, my voice hoarse from the near silence I'd always force myself into.

"I have to fucking find him! He's out there! If you motherfuckers won't let me out I'll-"

The lock on the door was pushed open with a heavy clang, startling me just a little. But in the end, that was where the problem came in — I'd been put on so many fucking drugs in the last five years that my mind was corrupt. I could barely remember him, this man I'd do anything to find. I missed him so fucking badly. Was he still the same as I remember? Indeed, what of him do I actually know anymore?

Within minutes I was hauled out of the cell and into the corridor, being taken to the medical ward I think. The turns seemed like it. The two orderlys that had dragged me there left the room after my straitjacket was removed and I'd been strapped to the table to be injected with fuck knows what. My vision was hazy afterwards, though only slightly; you learn to grow immune to their remedies if you try hard enough. The nurse sat at her desk, picking up a stethoscope to check my heart beat. The cold apparatus pressed against my skin, making me shiver. I imagined, as she leant forward in concentration, the thought of my teeth latching onto her wrist, pulling out a chunk of flesh and letting blood spill over the two of us. I don't know how that would aid my escape but that would come later. Her name badge read 'Nurse Monica Ollander', where had i heard that before?

The door opened again, but rather than the two orderlies like i had expected it was a young man, another doctor. He couldn't be much older than myself, perhaps a year or two. His face seemed to wear a natural smirk, he looked so familiar yet i couldn't put my finger on it. The two medical types engaged in quiet conversation, acting as if there wasn't a patient and wanted criminal tied to a table just a few feet away. I looked over, noticing the male doctor — apparently called "Danzig" judging from the conversation — was carrying a bag. Nothing special. It seemed the two had come to an agreement and the next thing i knew i was being untied, they were both helping me sit up.

Nurse Ollander was the first to talk:
"X? Patient X do you know where you are?"

how the fuck couldn't I? I've been here for half a decade

I nodded. She continued.

"I'm nurse Monica Ollander, this is my associate, Mr Sebastian Danzig. We're here to get you out of here. Our superior, Mr Barrett assigned us to this. You may know of his work. He works under the alias 'Dr Strangebomb'."

At that my eyes lit up, indeed I knew of him. He was the one who landed me in the hellhole. Now it was Danzig's turn to speak.

"Your partner, Black gave orders.. we're going to take you to change into something more inconspicuous," he indicated the bag "and then we'll lead you out. If you cooperate this can work."

I stayed quiet, taking in the soft sincerity that laced his voice.

I nodded again, reaching for the bag. I was told 'not yet.'. Typical. They lead me to a room that seemed unused, only then was i given the bag and told to change. It was odd how I remembered being brought here in these articles of clothing so well, I could still smell the spots of gasoline that had landed on the jeans i wore. Yet I could hardly remember someone I claimed to love so much. I did love him. I needed him.

I don't know what made me notice the tear rolling down my cheek then, was it for happiness or sadness? Happiness that I was moments from escape? Or sadness that I'd been confined here in the first place? It had become all one in the same to me. Minutes later I stepped out of the small room, dressed and ready to go.

I was almost free.

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