Roses

Chapter 1

'Roses are supposed to be the flower of love. The flower of romance. Right?'

That was my heading on the lined piece of paper in front of me. I then picked up my pen and pushed the lined paper aside.

Why?

I couldn't continue to write. It was too difficult. My face slowly heated up. My eyes watered. I couldn't even blink. If I did the tears would pour.

"I won't cry. I'm not going to cry," I kept repeating to myself.

I was wrong. The tears soon flowed slowly down my face. Those tears felt like acid on my skin, slowly peeling it away. The tears didn't even stop. They kept flowing and flowing. The pain in my face kept growing as each tear was shed. But still, they didn't stop. I could have begged them to stop. Plead them. Do anything for the tears to stop. But they wouldn't care. They would keep pouring out of my dull and tired eyes.

Then I heard them again. The voices were back. Before I could even agree with what they could have said, I hit my face on my desk. Immediately I felt pain, but the voices faded. My head kept on stinging.

Was it worth it?

I shook my head attempting to shake off the stinging pain. As I passed to go and lock my door I looked into my mirror. I saw something. Not something, I saw someone.

I saw someone who was pathetic. Who was fat. Who was ugly. Who was depressed. Who was upset. I saw someone who was always saying they were fine. I saw some other things, but only those stood out to me.

I then realized, I saw myself. I didn't see someone else struggling. I saw myself. I was pathetic. I was fat. I was ugly. I was depressed. I was upset. I was always saying I'm fine. I never let anyone know.

I shook it off and went to lock my door. I then proceeded to my window. I opened my window to look at the tree outside. I climbed over to it. Once I was on the branch I began to climb down the tree.

Both of my feet hit the ground. I then put on my headphones that were hanging around my neck. The song that was playing was 'Emtpy' on a 10 hour repeat. I enjoyed the song. It even helped me cope with what I'm going through. Even if it was useless, I guess it saved me from another day.

I made my way to the bus stop. It only took me waiting for three minutes after arriving for the bus to pull up; telling me and the other kids to get on. I stepped on last. I then made my way to the back. It was always not really crowded in the back. It wasn't what you'd expect. The front of the bus was chaotic and messy. While the back was peaceful and quieter. I sighed inaudibly. 

'At least my seat is open today.' I thought to myself as I sat in the back row corner seat.

After a couple of minutes after driving the bus pulled to a stop. Two girls that I haven't seen before had gotten on. One was kinda of tall. She looked around 5' 11", she also had a blue shirt with ruffles at the bottom, probably just to match her blue skirt that almost went down to her knees, and her light brown hair was dyed blue near the bottom. While the other girl in front of her was different. The girl in front was shorter, I would say about 5' 2" or 5' 1". The girl had a pink hoodie tied around her waist, but she had a grey shirt, black pants, and her raven black hair was messy and way shorter than the taller girl's hair. I found that really surprising since the colors didn't seem to complement each other. But what do I know.