Secrets

Chapter 1

Emily was always the girl who never showed her feelings. she was really good at school but wasnt a nerd, she was the typical teenage girl who thought she wasn't good enough for anyone if someone asked if she was okay she would mumble a, "yeah I'm fine." but she wasn't she would wear long sleeves everyday because she didn't want people to see the scars that ran up her arm. She didn't want to give them another reason to bully her.  As she remembers all the memories she has had with her older brother 'Sam' how many times he has told her that no one loved her. Making her feel like there was no one in the world there for you. How no one notice if she was gone. Sometimes she wonders if it's all true? Would the world actually be better if she was gone? Who would be sad? Oh Yeah no one...  she made up her mind, that night while everyone was asleep she would just make everyone happy, and leave. There was nothing that would change her mind. All through math she was thinking of how she would do it, would it be easier to just get it over with or have her suffer like she thought everyone else has by knowing her. She decided the longer she waits the more she annoys people so she decided to just get it over with and pop pills and just wait for her to pass out.

Emily's P.O.V

I opened up my binder trying to hold back the tears, in the back of my mind I kept thinking 'Why me?  What have I done to the world? What did I do to deserve this? Why can't I just be like the people I see around school, smiling all the time laughing with their friends.' I felt the tears in my eyes as I went up to Mr.Paul's desk and ask if I could go to the bathroom. Thankfully he said yes with a smile in his face, I gave him my best face smile ever I mean it's not his fault that I'M an emotional wreck that basically needs to go to the bathroom every 15 mins because something has to go through my brain and before anyone can see me and tears. God that's another reason why I think people tease me, I'm a fuck up that can't do anything right.  As soon as I got to the hallway I couldn't hold them back anymore. They all just started coming out one after another. One of my closest friends named Connor never went to class he would always wait outside my classroom till the class got out talking to his friends Ricky and Brad as soon as he heard the door to my math class open his head was turned into that direction. When he saw me with my hands to my face trying to wipe the tears away he jumped up and chased after me. I tried avoiding him cause I would somehow slip up and end up telling him I plan on ending it all tonight and he would use his charm against me and talk me out of it. And I can't let that happen I already promised my self that nothing would change my mind. I wanted to talk to him but I couldn't I mean how could I with the state I'm in, as soon as I reached the bathroom I felt a pair of hands on my shoulder pushing their way to turn me around and once they did I saw his concerned face and instantly passed out all I heard was his voice telling me to not give up and leave him and to stay with him. And I didn't want to.