send help

Part 1

You don't listen, but I still love you. Someone told me to give up, but I keep pushing.  My heart is strong, but you'd never know. Every time we talk, how come I'm pushed away? I wanna know more about you, but you never hear me. I know I sin and sting, that's how I really feel. I wish I could show you how we feel, but you never listen. You say that you're an open person, but when i wanna talk you seem to be closed off. I want to show you how much I care about you, but I'm afraid you'll push me away like you've done before.

One night, you told me about the girls in your class. How they called you weird and I told you I was alright with that.  You told me it's like a beesting "you cry over it once, it's over with." How do you live like this? I have no way to know how you think, so I go with it anyway. After that night, I tried to show you as much love as possible. Within a few minutes, the self hate you have for yourself shinned through. I guess that's why I decided to show you how much I care about you and how much I support you.

I just hope someday or feel the same about me.