Thank You, Connor Murphy

Chapter Two: Evan

What's up, guys? New chapter! Okay, so in this chapter we're going to time skip to when Evan gets home because it would take WAY to long to do it from the moment he runs out of the bathroom. Lots of love, as always.

-Kitty

(Trigger Warnings: Mention of panic attack)

I walk along the grey pathway to my house. I fumble to get my key out of my backpack. I finally manage to pull the silver key out and unlock the door. Stepping inside, I pull off my New Balance shoes. I walk upstairs and open the door to my room.

My room is pretty nice. Not huge, big enough. The walls are painted light blue, and there's enough room for a desk and a dresser. I go over to my desk and sit down, pulling out my phone. I open iMessages and text the one person who might understand even the tiniest bit.

Acorn: Hey Jared

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: uh hi?

Acorn: So you know that kid who you called a school shooter today?

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: the psycho

Acorn: Well yeah but I don't think he's really a psycho.

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: and why would you think this

Acorn: Well I mean I was having a panic attack after he pushed me but then he helped me I guess?? It's hard to explain??

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: slow down

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: im sorry WHAT

Acorn: He helped me??

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: oh man this just keeps getting better

Acorn: ...

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: so the SCHOOL SHOOTER helped you out of a panic attack

Acorn: Yeah....

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: unbelievable

Acorn: ...

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: your not messing with me right

Acorn: No

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: well now that thats confirmed i have more important things to attend to

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: such as my real friends

Acorn: Okay bye

THEINSANELYCOOLJAREDKLIENMAN: adios

I click my phone off and lean back in my chair. Well he was no help at all. I mean, it's probably not his fault he most likely has more important things to attend to that's not me. I zip open my backpack and pull out my laptop to finish my therapy letter. I was going to finish it in the computer lab, but then that kid pushed me down and I started having a panic attack. And the he helped me.

Dear Evan Hansen,

Today is going to be a good day and here's why. Because, today, all you have to be is yourself. And approachable. And easy to talk to. But, you know, be yourself. That's the big one.

So far, the day hasn't gone absolutely terribly. I mean, you were pushed down by this kid, and then you had a panic attack, and he helped you. Why would he help you anyway? He did yell at you before. And you weren't even laughing at him. Maybe you should give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he heard you laughing even though you weren't.

What was his name again? Right. Connor Murphy. I think he might be Zoe's older brother. Maybe that'll be a good conversation starter for us. "Hey, I think I know your brother. Tall guy, long hair? Yeah, he yelled at me and pushed me once, which made me have a panic attack, which he helped me out of." Never mind.

Sincerely,

Me.

I close the laptop. Sighing, I lean back into my chair. I was never going to get with Zoe. She was so perfect. Beautiful, smart, a fantastic musician. She plays the guitar in jazz band, and is great at it. I go to every one of her concerts. I don't ever talk to her, though. I always get too nervous. Like that time when I had the absolute perfect opportunity to talk to her, and I was going to be super causal and be like, 'Oh your name's Chloe?" And she would be like, 'No I said Zoe." and I would be like, 'Oh yeah, I thought you said Chloe, because I'm very distracted with other stuff right now.'

But I never did, because I started worrying about my palms being sweaty. But they didn't start getting sweaty until I started worrying about them being sweaty. Then, I went into the bathroom to put them under the hand dryer, but they didn't dry, they just got very warm. So now they were warm and sweaty.

I stand up and walk downstairs. I open the front door and start walking to Ellison Park. I had a job there this summer, as a apprentice park ranger. It was so amazing. All day, I got to walk around trees. I love trees. A lot.

I arrive at Ellison and start walking. No one's here right now. The trees tower over me like giants. I reach the middle of the forest, where the forty foot tall oak tree stands. I broke my arm falling out of it this summer.

I stand next to the tree. It's sunny outside, but the shade under the tree is cool. I close my eyes and wrap my arms against the wooden trunk. I breathe in the air. I try to forget the day and just enjoy the moment.

For a second, I can. For a second, I feel completely and simply happy. Until I hear a voice.

"Hansen?"

Oh no.