HOLES (Squidward x Spongebob) Human schoolboy Au

Chapter 4: I hate coleslaw

(sandy up top^^all credits goes to XiaozuoZ :)

"So Spongebob, got your eye on anyone?" Pearl asked casually while unzipping her glittery pink lunch bag. It was now lunchtime and Spongebob was sitting with Pearl, Sandy and Patrick. Larry wasn't with them as he had a different lunch period.

"Sorry?" Spongebob replied absentmindedly, trying not to retch at the disgusting goo or apparently, "coleslaw" he just got from the cafeteria. He should've brought lunch. What he wouldn't do for a burger right now.

"Like, you know, have you seen anyone you find attractive?" Pearl explained, batting her eyelashes innocently, making Patrick scoff at his side. "Or even someone you like?"

"Uhh nah I haven't really thought about it...I'm just focusing on adjusting right now really," He answered as truthfully as he could. He hasn't really noticed anyone in particular. His stomach and mind was still dropping at the thought of coleslaw anyways.

"Are you sure?" Pearl pressed on, twirling her platinum blonde hair around her index finger tightly. "We know everything and anything about everyone at this school so now would be the time to spill."

"oh my god how desperate can you get?" Patrick queried loudly, eyes rolling into oblivion.

"Shut up, slut, I'm just being polite!" Pearl said, her voice a tad more high pitched and her cheeks now had a slight pink tinge to it. "And don't pretend you haven't been thinking about this exact thing." she added the last part in a sort of hissy whisper.

"The fuck? How am I the slut? I'm not the one-"

They began bickering loudly, and Spongebob drowned it all by being lost in his thoughts.

He had actually racked his brain to think of a person of interest just so he didn't have to think about the disgusting mess on his food tray otherwise known as coleslaw. He had a flash of warm brown eyes, unkempt blue hair and plump pink lips set in a permanent scowl. The more he thought about it, the more vivid the image was. He felt heat rise up to his face and a new stirring feeling in his stomach. I mean, he did think Squidward was a rather comely young lad who piqued his interest very much, but would it be creepy to ask about him when they were practically strangers? And last he checked, dude hated his guts anyways. Despite these thoughts, Spongebob found himself saying:

"Squidward, uhm, what do you know about him?"

before he could stop himself.

There was a few moments of silence after he said that. Pearl and Patrick had stopped arguing and sat staring at him weirdly. Patrick had even turned his flexible starfish-like body to look wide-eyed at Spongebob directly. And Sandy, who had been on her phone, looked up with an unreadable expression.

Patrick was the first to break the silence with a dramatic huff. " Why do you want to know about that loser for?" He said harshly.

"huh?"

"I mean, he's literally a nobody. Trust me, he's not worth knowing." Spongebob was dumbfounded when he saw Patrick glaring at his manicured nails, a look of surprising anger mixed with something else that Spongebob could not pinpoint.

Across him, Pearl was giving Patrick an all knowing look that was laced with pity. Spongebob was thoroughly confused and slightly embarrassed. He felt a heavy need to apologise, but was interrupted by Sandy.

"Who's that again?"

"y'know, that green haired, lone wolf guy who always looks like someone took a giant dump on his emotions." Pearl quipped helpfully, trying to lighten the mood a bit-albeit unsuccessful. Spongebob didn't know why, but he felt a sort of defensive rage at her words.

"My mind's still blank..." Sandy trailed off, looking at the ceiling comically, as if that'll help her remember easier.

"Can we just talk about something more productive? Like talking about that lame nobody gives no benefit." Patrick still had that same look that Spongebob thought looked like he was seriously constipated. His hands were toying aimlessly with his star pendant.

Pearl, sensing the awkward tension, started asking Spongebob about his interests and hobbies instead.

And just like that, the subject of Squidward was dropped and wasn't mentioned at all after that. Spongebob had engaged with the group-after a while Patrick had returned to his loud, sassy self and participated in asking him questions with Pearl- but his mind couldn't help pondering hard about the confusing reaction from before. Well, how could he?

Seriously, what the fuck was that? Spongebob kept thinking throughout lunch.

***********

"Byeee I'm going to miss you babe!" Patrick was exclaiming at Spongebob from across the hallway as he made his way to his class. A few kids turned their way, but of course Patrick didn't care. In fact, Spongebob noted that he seemed to be enjoying the attention.

Spongebob sighed, smoothing out his hair which had been ruffled previously by Patrick before opening the door to go into his fifth period classroom.

This was the first class that he didn't share with Patrick or anyone from "the squad", which was slightly disappointing, but he wasn't that fazed about it.

He was about to walk into the classroom when suddenly, Spongebob's forehead collided with a firm chest and he was sent backwards onto the floor, a loud smack echoing in the hallway as his perky ass hit the tiles.

"Ow, what the hell?" he muttered, rubbing his sore bum.

"...shit, sorry bout that..." He heard a voice mumble from above him. Wait, he recognised that voice- a voice that always had a hint of annoyance rumbling through it.

Spongebob felt his body turn frozen as he looked up to see a certain green haired boy staring, no, glaring down at him with his hand out.

"umm did the fall jumble up your fucking brain? Hurry up!" Squidward hissed at the blonde boy beneath him.

Spongebob broke out of his momentary trance and took squidward's hands in his as leverage to get up. He felt a quick electric shock travel throughout his body at the contact and retreated his hand as soon as he was up. He noticed that his hands had begun to sweat heavily and attempted to wipe them hastily on his jeans.

"Uhh th-thanks Squidward-" Spongebob began, but Squidward was already walking quickly away from where he stood, not even sparing a glance back.

Spongebob watched until Squidward turned right at the end of the hallway and disappeared. He felt a bit frustrated and sad at Squidward's recurring aloofness towards him but knew that it was to be expected. His thoughts were interrupted by his teacher calling his name and that's when he realised that he had been standing near the classroom door and staring at where Squidward had disappeared for at least 5 minutes.

Spongebob blushed heavily as he made his way into the classroom and sat next to a friendly girl who had said hi to him. Even though this was one of his favourite subjects -History- Spongebob spent the whole lesson daydreaming about the the green haired boy instead.

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hello guys im back from the dead hehe heres a shit update enjoy xx