56. I'm Okay

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if i'm happy
how can i write these poems
of pain and fear.
maybe i became numb to this pain
i've been feeling.
that might be a good thing.
there's no one to love
no friends to hold
no anxiety to pay attention to.
just this striking germaphobic tendency
that crawls up my back
and suffocates me like a disease.
but i'm okay.
i'm good.
i'm numb.
but i'm okay.

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