username BLACK

Chapter 5

"Okay." I said with composure.

She raised her eyebrows, surprised. She was shocked because I wasn't. People expect you to react the way they would have reacted, I suck at satisfying their expectations.

"There was no lioness, black." She sat down, her hands in hair.

"It's okay." I said puling the sheets. "I want to sleep now."

Her mask was gone. Was I really not disappointed?

"You need to know one thing black." She said. "Whatever we are getting into, there's no return from it."

"I don't want to return." I said. "I don't wanna go back."

"They killed my parents." She said, her head on my chest. "They raped me..." Her voice broke, her throat appeared to grow narrow. "I was 14, just 14..." She broke down. Her tears, mixed with her makeup, that dark mascara and face powder, dripping on my chest. Her mascara all over her cheeks, like she was crying mascara out of those big anime like eyes.

"Mr Han and his men found me." She breathed in, inhaling that mascara-makeup concoction of hers. Mascara has propylene Glycol, it can cause skin irritation. Retinyl Acetate could do harm at cellular level, no one knows it. No one wants to. She was breathing it in. "He helped me out, now all I want is justice."

"No. don't mistake revenge for justice." I corrected her.

I felt emotionally disconnected from her, she was crying but I couldn't feel anything, no empathy. It was like being a deaf guy at a rock concert, you can see everyone jumping, and losing their fucking heads but you can't feel the urge to do it. Her face sunk between my arm and my body, she continued sobbing.

"I once killed a dog." I said. "It was a big fluffy German shepherd, you know, enormous and powerful. So I, one day pick it up with the help of some bitch urine. Dogs like it, you see. Then I got it in the back yard, threw some napalm over it and set it on fire."

"You are a disgusting human being." She said making a face.

"No." I retorted. "I did it because I wanted to test what I made. It was a failure anyways."

"The dog died?" She asked, her hair sticking to her cheeks covering her full face but an eye.

"No." I breathed. "The fire didn't go off even with water. We killed it by injecting it with toxins."

"Why?" She asked.

"To end its suffering."

"Or to hide what you had done?" She said with hatred in her eyes.

"Isn't that what happened with you?" I replied. "But they decided otherwise, letting you live and suffer?"

She stood up, wearing her jeans in a hurry. Her leg stuck between my legs.

"Let it go." She said furiously.

"What's your name?" I twisted my legs, making the grip harder.

"Let it go black."

"Did I hurt you?"

She pulled a pistol, a silenced one with holes to let the gas escape, shoving it inside my mouth touching the back of my throat.

"Let go."

I moved my head in a No, ogling her in the eyes, dominating and finally letting her into agreement.

"Matilda." She said.

I loosened up my grip, letting her leg go.

"I don't wanna go now." She sat down on me. "I love you."