I'm So Afraid Of Flavortown

An Evening With The Buck

The time had come.

Guy found an excuse to dip out of Mick's party early and head over to the Montage hotel, where a devastatingly handsome man awaited him. He twiddled his fingers the whole Uber ride to his destination, nervous and excited for the event this evening would bring.

Maybe this is just a bro hangout? Fieri thought. He still couldn't believe that someone who radiated such... big dick energy... would be interested in a sad peasant such as him.

As he walked into the lobby a young fan approached him, adorned in flames and nerd goggles.

"OMG SIR FIERI CAN I HAVE YOUR AUTOGRAPH?" she screeched. "I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT MY WHOLE LIFE! YOU SAVED ME!"

While the young girl screamed and cried, a fancily dressed hotel servant slipped him a note.

Leaning in he whispered, "Mr. Buckingham gave me instructions to deliver this to you."

Opening the note, Guy saw a room number scribbled on the paper. 

Room 69. See you soon, I'm preparing the chipotle ranch ;)

The Guy's Grocery Games creator smirked. "69, huh?"

Turning to the fan who still remained yelling by his side, Fieri grabbed her by the shoulders with determination.

"Sorry, toots. I've got a dick appointment and I can't be tardy." 

********

"65, 67, ah, 69." Good ole' 69. 

His fingers ached as they neared the door. The moment of truth. Is this a casual hookup? Or what Fieri feared, just a friendly hangout? 

Guy knocked three times, a number most people associate with the call of the devil, mocking God and His word. But if you're intelligent like the Guyster, you'd know it was actually called The Knock of Buttsex. Fuck that dude Jesus, Fieri knows what the FUCK is up. Satan doesn't want into your soul, he wants into your ANUS. 

When the door didn't open, he was hesitant to thump the wooden panels again and break the code of the rhythmic booty call knock. 

However, he needn't worry, for just then a whoosh of air waved through his spiked frosted tips as his mayhaps soon to be lover opened the entrance into his room.

Adorned in a silk robe and not much else, the guitarist stood in the doorway. 

"Entrez s'il vous plait," the shorter man spoke, entrancing Guy with his sexy albeit inaccurate French accent. 

As Fieri entered, Lindsey asked about the party.

"Eh, it was pretty fun just not really my scene."

"I can understand that," he shut the door, walking up just behind the Food Network star, leaning into his ear from behind.

"Mick can be a little extravagant at times." 

Lindsey's breath on his ear excited him, a little too much to his liking. 

Mother of Chorizo, this man shouldn't have this much of an effect on me...

But he did. And Fieri craved more. 

A/N: short update. I know everyone must be on the edge of their seats reading this and awaiting the glorious smut, but I want to do it right and I'm currently not in the right mind space to be writing such brave and groundbreaking literary art at the moment... TBC