Just an average girl
She always wore a smile
She was cheerful and happy
For a short while
Now she's all gone
Things are getting colder
Life's was just the way she was told
No one needed to tell her
She told them she was down
But they let it slip by
So from then on she kept it on the inside
She told herself she was alright
But she was telling white lies
Why couldn't they tell?!
Look at her dull eyes
She tried to stop herself from crying over several nights
But she knew there was no chance of feeling alright
Summer came by she didn't wear long sleeves
She wanted them to notice her battles you see
She knew she was depressed
And even admitted
She didn't fit in
And no one seemed to miss it
She tried to carry on like a soldier with battle wounds
Bleeding out from every scar her body consumed
She had lots of friends at school
But alone she sat
Even if someone noticed
She'd tell them that
That the cuts on her wrist were no mistake
But no one cared to save her from her self hate
Things were always down
Never went up
And she's here now
Stuck in this stupid rut
She knew she had to do it
Ran to the bathroom
opened the cabinet
She looked at herself
'Look at me now!
Are you proud of the "perfect" child?!'
And she knew it was her mother to blame
Though her family should all bow down their heads in shame
She grabbed her pills
and looked out at the moon
'In a minute it'll all be over soon'
Her body fell down as she started choking
It's almost over
It's almost done
Please hurry I wanna greet death
Her sister walks in as her struggle stopped
Nothing can take back what she just saw
The little girl that she loved just laying there
She dropped to her knees trying to help
She got the pills out and held her sister with care
All she did was stare
how could this be fair?!
She pulled away as the tears rolled down her face
She whispered
'I'm sorry sis, this world is just not my place'
'I've tried for years now
Trying to fix this'
'But I've come to the point
That I give in'
'No one loves me here
I'm just a waste of space'
'I have no reason to stay here with such an awful race '
'It's a disgrace,
I was misplaced'
'Born in the wrong time,
And at the wrong place'
'It's ok though,
Cause maybe you'd see me soon'
'You'd know when your time was up'
'To look at the moon'
'And as it shines bright '
'Throughout the night'
'Just remember that everyone is facing their own fight'
'I couldn't deal with the pain,
I'm not a fighter'
She cried more
And hugged her sister tighter
She picked her up
And carried her to her room
Laid her in the bed
And turned off the lights too
'In a year you'd forget I was gone
I'm not anything to dwell on'
Her sister looked at her
'You are precious to me'
'I'm sorry I never showed you right'
'You almost lost your life, I need you to stay alright?'
'I'm watching over you,I'll do it from the clouds above'
'I love you more than the purest and whitest love'
'I love you too much to let you go'
She placed a kiss on her
'Goodnight'
I'm sorry...
I just wanted to let everyone know..
My sister didn't care about me at first because she was too busy sluting off
My oldest sister abused me till she left for college
My mom neglected me
My dad seemed to only care about my grades and behavior most of the time
My 'friends' aka my cousins never believed the cuts came from me and thought they were just scratches I got from playing too rough
My actual friends thought the same
I guess my slut of a sister came to her senses after I talked with her about her boy
I'm sorry I never spoke bout it when I was on
I was so ashamed
Especially after what I've been doing to myself now
I'm just a mess and I don't know what to do
I give advice to the best of my ability but can't give myself any..
I only have one thing to say now
Can anyone help me?...
Just be there for me when I need you..
I'll do the same..
If you notice I'm different than how I usually am
Break it out of me..
I crack easily..
If you want to ignore this
Then go ahead..
See you guys....
