In My Prison

• Spiritseeker •

(tw for this chapter: abuse)

DREW'S FLASHBACK

When I was a little kid witnessing those apples never hitting the concrete pavement I yelped at my mom and said that the man had a "ghost" (from what I presumed) friend following him. My mom told me I was delusional. We drove off and the spirit waved at me. I jumped up and down my car seat and dad slammed on the brakes. He buckled me up as tight as he could and told me to shut up or I'm getting locked in the room. I stayed silent as I looked back at the window pane. The raindrops started trickling.

The air conditioner was only on at the lowest register, but I felt a cold breeze. I left my sweater at home, as I thought my parents would bring me for a quick stroll at the park. Turns out they picked up groceries as I waited in the car.

My parents. They owned a nice car, nice house yet they try to spend so little. I barely got any candy, chocolate bars or even toys after a shopping trip. Unless I tried to sneak one, for some weird reason the chocolate bars were always too high for me to reach.

(I then discovered sooner a spirit has been reaching it up. They didn't want a bad influence.)

I started crying silently, because if mom heard me she would have slapped me to "give me a reason to cry". So then my teardrops synced with the rain slowly falling down my car window. I watched the street lights flicker and I keep seeing those...ghosts moving. There's something wrong with me, I thought. The cold breeze began moving back and forth my arms, like I was caressing it. It was weird, but it's got to mean something as to why I feel so cold. 

The car stopped. We're home. Finally. I thought to myself. I only know two places, with me being only 4 years old that time. Those being the house and the school. I never went to school when I was still living with my real parents. I only passed by there every morning in the car. My mom thinks I'm too dumb to even interact with them.

Well, that's why I'm illiterate.

My mom and dad unloaded the groceries while I was told to go to my room. I waddled to the door and closed it but left an opening enough for me to hear what was going on. I grabbed my turtle plush and tried to sing to myself to tire me, even a little.

We need to get rid of her. Tomorrow.

My eyes widened. Why are they getting rid of me? Are they gonna leave me with a different family? I was devastated. Well, for a 4-year old. I couldn't take it. I screamed.

WHY? DO YOU NOT LOVE ME?!

I yelled as loud as I could. I didn't care about neighbors, it's better if they knew how mean and uncaring the parents in that little house were.

Go back to you room, Drew. Mom told me. I'm not going back there! Tell me why you said you're getting rid of me?! Do you not love me? Am I too stupid for you, Mama? Am I?!-

That's when I saw a flash of my father's hand before hitting the cold, marble flooring of the living room. He did this. She caused this. They really hated me. I'm a mistake. MISTAKE.

My mom pulled me by the hair.

Maybe now you'll get a hint why we're sending you off. You're still 4 years old yet you have such a bad mouth! Do you know respect?! I can't raise a daughter like that.

I didn't understand her words but maybe she was right. Maybe she wasn't. She was exaggerating.

All I know is that I hate Mom and Dad.

I grabbed the turtle plush and Dad soon bolted in my room. I stayed at the corner of my bed, crying for dear life. He almost hit me but a light blinded him.

Blue. It was blue. I didn't know what color it was but now I know.

The cold breeze from earlier embraced me like a blanket.

Whatever. Go to bed. I'm packing your things. You're leaving this house and I'll never have to see your face ever again.

I shivered in fear, clutching my turtle plush tight. I closed my eyes and had a pitch black dream, like how I thought my future was going to be.

The next morning, I was already in another bed.

Hello, Drew. We'll take care of you here.

I bolted. I surprised the caretaker and ran straight to the window. The car was driving away.

It was only me and my turtle plush that time.

Where's my Hope now?