Pillow (TodoBaku)

Chapter 10: A Break

Image from the manga.

(Short chapter, but it catches us up on Todoroki's feelings lately.)

~Chapter 10: A Break~

>Todoroki's PoV<

The infatuation in the sensation I get in my hands, on my lips, where I desperately try to remember where and how I touched him- it makes me feel perverted as if I have taken advantage of Bakugou's moments of openness.

I noticed, he is more cautious around me lately, ever since I kissed him, I think- and he gets so cute and red when he talks to me sometimes, sometimes it's like those quips of his are no longer coated with mal-intent but instead simply to keep up his reputation, perhaps his walls that he keeps from getting anyone too close to him, but in a strange way it eggs me on.

Purposefully, I've switched my pillow routine up, opting for the soft one- it would likely decrease the amount of Bakugou dreams I have, which mainly consist of groping and that troubled expression of his, it's a logical change, I will start to feel burnt out if I wake up every morning hard.

It's another reason why I feel so guilty lately in regards to being a pervert- from what I know, Bakugou sees me as a guy he rivals, occasionally convenient to have around, but I take advantage of that and try to engage in contact.

Could it be considered some sort of exploitation?

Sighing, I pulled on some casual clothes, wanting to go out for the night, get my mind off the guilt in the back of my mind.

I was going to go out in a regular turtleneck, putting on a beanie to prevent instant recognition, I was more in a mood to be alone after all.

I wandered around some semi-populated streets for a while, I decided to go into a calm looking bar on a whim, it seemed chill enough.

"Welcome."

I greeted them, taking a seat at the stool, looking around, it was mainly men lounging around, but I didn't pay much mind anyway.

"What would you like?"

"Umeshu."

I rubbed my neck, adjusting my beanie to make sure my hair wasn't too visible.

"You've been on the news lately," the bartender said, placing my drink in front of me, "It still is surprising to see you here though."

I looked at him, he seemed attentive yet not caught up in who I was- it was compelling to talk to him.

"I wanted to get a drink."

He nodded, "Everyone needs one every now and then," he said, cleaning his work area, before returning his attention to me, "Would you like to talk?"

"Ah, I can't," I would like to, but I've learned my lesson.

"I'm not one to run my mouth, it is a part of my job."

"How so?"

He hummed, leaning on the side of the wall, "Some people around here aren't out, if I see them outside, I don't tell," he said, what does he mean by 'out', "Everything said here stays here."

"'Out'? What does that mean?" I ask, unable to contain my curiosity.

He, for the first time, seemed shocked, "You- this is a gay bar, you know that right?"

Ah, that explains why everyone here is a guy.

"I see..."

"Are you going to leave now that you know?"

I shook my head, "I like the ambiance."

He nodded, taking out a cigarette, "Have a light?"

Even though I knew I didn't, I patted my pockets- but thought of another idea.

With my finger, I sparked up a small flame, surprising him, but he didn't refuse the offer.

He relaxed, leaning against the wall again, it felt like he was telling me to talk, so I did, "I have been feeling guilty lately."

"How so?"

He wasn't uninterested, but he wasn't making a big deal out if it- thank god, "The person- the guy I like, we aren't close, but we have been together for missions- I feel like I am taking advantage of him."

He raised a brow, "Taking advantage of him? Do you mean sexual stuff?"

I shook my head fast, feeling myself grow hot, "Ah- no no, I've just been touching his arms or head," I said, suddenly remembering his lips on mine, immediately touching my own, "I... I kissed him too."

"Good job."

"What?" I said, getting a bit too worked up, freezing a patch of the counter, "Isn't it wrong to do this to him?"

He smiled, "That is just flirting, no harm in it," he said as I melted the ice with my other hand, "Even better if he didn't reject you after you kissed him."

"Well, he couldn't reject me at the moment..."

"What about after?" he said, wiping the counter, "Was he upset with you after?"

After?

His image of being embarrassed as I massaged the wig off came to mind- he was okay, even after I had already kissed him.

I felt hot again, more so than before, "No... he didn't comment."

"That's a good sign," he smiled, handing me another cup of my drink, "He wasn't upset with you, you can continue pursuing him."

So... so it is okay for me to continue pursuing him?

"Hey handsome, I noticed you across the bar," a guy behind me said, touching my shoulder firmly, moving to my bicep, "Oh- I know you, you are on the news a lot."

I nodded, I guess I am.

"He's here for advice, not scouting, look for someone else," the bartender said, and the guy pouted.

"Well, if you ever want someone, even if it is for a night, you can find me here every night," he said, suddenly getting closer, "I would love to ride you and have you come inside me."

"That's enough," the bartender said, but I was too in shock- unable to process the last sentence.

"What- what did he mean by 'ride' me?" I said, but I felt like it was bound to be something lewd.

He shook his head, "He wants to have sex with you," he said, almost exasperated, "Are you sure you are gay? You don't know much do you?"

"I guess not," I said, rubbing my neck, "I'll come back if I need advice. Thank you."

Humming, he said his farewell, I walked out, thankfully only those two said something to me.

Ride me huh. Come in him? Could that be?

Suddenly, the image of Bakugou squatted on top of me came to mind, exposed and amazingly red, keeping his shirt up via biting his shirt, similar to the dreams I have every now and then.

"Fuck."

I shook my head, it may that I am getting drunk, I usually don't think of these things in public.

There was a sudden ding in my pocket, it must be a text, probably from Midoriya.

[From: Bakugou: You busy?]

(Fly by editing on 4/18/2020.)