All Strings Attached (english)

Square One

I exited the hotel lobby and hailed a cab. What a perfect ending to our post 8th anniversary dinner.

The next morning, I booked a flight to Korea for the following weekend. I needed to get away. My mom kept bugging me with questions when I got home in a cab. She was in my room the next morning asking why Tyler sent over dozens of pink flowers. I told my Mom we were over and asked her to leave my room. When I told her at dinner that I was going to fly out of the country for a while, she wasn’t surprised. She was used to me travelling alone and I guess, Mom knew I needed time by myself.

I stayed in South Korea for 2 weeks and just came back this weekend. I didn’t even get the chance to tell my girls about what happened.  I sent them all the same message before I boarded the plane, “Going to Seoul for a while. Single again. If Tyler calls you, don’t mind him. See you when I get back!” then I turned off my phone the rest of the trip.

Come Friday evening, we were at our favorite café while having our cars washed. Everyone opened up their schedule to meet with me. They were so anxious to hear about what happened. My girls – Nadine, Sophie, Julianne. All present.

“What in the world happened??!” Sophie immediately asked as we sat in one of the window seats.

“We were practically planning your beach wedding and the names of your cute little babies!” Julianne gasped.

“Zelene, what got into you?!” it was Sophie, my bestest friend.

“Are you high? Have you been sniffing rubber or leather? Stop burning your designer shoes to get high. Or did you just get new medication and this is the side-effect?” Nadine, as always, so creative.

“Well, I missed you all too.” I said dryly.

“We didn’t see each other for months and you even recently posted a ‘Happy 8th’ collage of you and Tyler, and now you’ve broken up??” Julianne was on a roll.

“I just woke up and I didn’t wanna be with Tyler anymore.” I stirred my coffee.

“Have you gone back to your Samantha Jones self?” I looked wide-eyed at Sophie. Wow, my Samantha Jones self had not come out for nearly 8 years.

“New boytoy? Or did someone come back into your life?” probed Nadine.

“AS IF I’d take them back if any one did!” I immediately snapped at her.

“Oh yeah, I forgot, no return no exchange” I never get back with any of my former boyfriends or lovers or flings. If it’s over then it’s over. That’s it. I don’t believe that you’d break it off or even think of breaking it off with a person if you really want to be with that person. Even if you were so angry that you want to skin that person alive, one should still be careful with the words that come out of your mouth during a fight. If you’re going to leave, be sure you stand by your decision. No turning back.

 “So… that’s your reason? You got tired? Fed up?” asked Nadine

“I missed being single.” I let out a sigh. I actually got fed up of all the factors in my life; Tyler being one of them. I had just quit from a job at an Advertising firm. My parents were pressuring me to take over our business. I was also pondering on Grad School or Law School. FML.

“And just when we’ve all gotten married and Sophie here has a… ahem… relationship, you decide you want to be single again?” exclaimed Julianne.

“You’re turning 31 next year. Is this some kind of midlife crisis?” asked Sophie.

“God guys! Enough with the lecture. I just broke up with a guy, as if it’s anything new. After a breakup, what does one do? Huh? You shout, NEXT!!! Like that!” snapping my fingers.

“Girl, you were together 8 years. Of course, we’d be shocked. My husband almost choked on his wine when I told him about it.” Said Julianne.

“My husband, by the way, wanted me to tell you that you and he are drinking tomorrow, if you’re up to it. If you want to drink every day, he’s okay with it, as long as you guys drink at our house.” Nadine shared.

“Your husbands are sooo supportive. They seem to be forgetting that I don’t drink to wallow in sadness or tragedy.” Louie and Jordan are my drinking buddies, along with the rest of their friends. I’m the only one in their wives' circle who drinks as much as they do. They take me to their sessions so often that even Louie and Jordan’s relatives know that I can hold my liquor.

“But are you sure you’re okay?” Nadine asked. Eyeing me with all seriousness. I can never hide anything from Nadine.

I fell silent. I wasn’t sure how to respond. I’m okay, a bit relieved, I guess. Sad. Hurt. But I’m firm with my decision.

“Of course, I’m okay.” I assured her. Or myself.

“Bullcrap.” She retorted. Nadine and I were the kind of friends who barely needed words. It’s like one knows exactly what one is feeling.

“Shut up. I’m okay!!”

Julianne and I were practically 5 blocks from each other growing up. We were always at each other’s houses. Sophie and I had been on the same wavelength since the first time we met. Nadine and I have a different sort of bond; we also both are always on guard of our feelings but can see through each other. A lot alike but a bit different.

“That’s your decision and I know no one can do anything about it.”

“Thank you for the support. I’ll count on your votes on the next elections!” I jokingly said my hands fist bumped in the air like a politician.

“You’re hopeless, Zelene!”

The night went on as usual, full of laughter and a lot of catching up. Our friendship has occasional drama, but no one is allowed to cry because of heartbreak or a break-up. I would be the first to hit them on the head if anyone did cry. Heartbreak is not a sign of weakness; I told them early on, it is a sign of strength. You find out that you’re strong enough to let go and that you are strong enough to feel and bear the pain that comes with it.

I live by certain life rules. Never admit. Never assume. Don’t get caught, and if you do, never confess. If some guy cheats on you, we burn his house down or his car. Pieces of advice that mostly came from my Uncle and my Dad, given to me when I was 12. I have probably perfected the game of relationships and love. I have had a number of relationships and a number of on the sides. I don’t have a bad reputation though, because I can be quite discreet. I do have a bit of a player rep but I think the 8 years with Tyler slowly erased that. Despite being with anyone, I don’t even bring dates in any of the important occasions. As much as possible, I come by myself even if their name were on the invitation. I try not to depend too much on someone else.

Tyler and I started fine. We were good friends, we started dating, there was no courtship; one night he just flat out asked me to be his girlfriend, and I agreed. We seemed happy to most people. I just don’t know what else was missing. I never did try to tell him I was feeling a bit… I don’t know… empty?

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Gong Yoo as Tyler Reuben Chen