How punk-rock built my confidence

English essay "Write about something you like" or "How punk-rock built my confidence"

When someone asks me to talk or write about a subject I like, I have 2 possibilities : Music or other countries’ culture (mostly England and Japan). I chose to talk about a kind of music I love, for many reasons, and which always inspire me : the Rock, and more precisely, the Punk-Rock.

People are always stunned when I tell them : “I love punk rock !”. They’re always like “What? YOU?! No way !!!”. Well, I feel bound to recognize that’s definitely not the first thing that someone could notice when he meets me!

I discovered punk-rock when I saw God save the Queen’s video for the first time. It makes at least 3 years – I’m pretty sure it was during the 2007 summer, In fact, I had already heard this song before, on the radio or somewhere else. When I saw the clip, I was voiceless, thinking “What’s that? That’s so... weird!” and obviously, Johnny Rotten’s trembling voice was quite involved...

I asked my father about it but he didn’t really listen to punk-rock when he was young – he was more U2, The Cure, Indochine, or even Madonna. – so I had to make some researches on internet. I have been trying to make out the right from the wrong since then. There’s a lot of prejudices on punks (synonym of hooligan/lowlife) and even sometimes mistaken for the boneheads because of their violent behaviour, whereas they are differents! It’s a fact that punks used to wear some provocative clothes like a red shirt with a swastika, which can explain the misunderstanding. In fact, punks have aimed shocking people wearing it. Moreover, they’re anti-fascists so it would be nonsense.

From my part, since the 3°, I finally dare to dress myself like I wanted, at school, with some punk inspirations. First, with some details like chains, necklaces and my tartan skirt. Then, I began to often wear torn jeans and weird shirts the following year. I never though that I could wear it in public one day. It seems stupid but I always was a very bashful girl (almost like a pathological shyness) and I always took care of what I said, the way I dressed and even my tastes for fear of everybody’s thoughts. Always wishing I could be a fly on the wall. However, some events are helping me to change. Well, it won’t be glaring... but the more time I pass with my friend, the more I feel confident!

If I love punk-rock, it’s not only because of the music – and I totally handle that Rotten isn’t the best singer in the world... – but mostly because of the ideology, very often included in the punk songs’ lyrics.

My idol is Sid Vicious (Ines can’t bear him anymore; I talk a lot about him – and also about Harry Judd from MCFLY...moving on!). By “idol” I mean that I really admire who he was and always feel moved when I think about his story. Everybody sees him like a “violent junkie who couldn’t play bass” but all his relatives say that he was kind and sensitive.

I just wanted to know nothing but the truth about him, so I read a lot of testimonials, watched some movies (“Sid&Nancy”, “The Great Rock’n’roll swindle”...) and interviews.

My next reading in english will be “No one is innocent” by Alan Parker. It deals with Sid’s life : his childhood, his SexPistols’ bassist time... and his destructive relationship with his ex-girlfriend, Nancy Spungen, who might have been killed by him – but I’ll believe in his inocence as long as they won’t bring more evidences. I mean, even if he really killed her, I find it unfair that people should hate or accuse him for that!... I impersonate an heartless... Well, I have to confess that I never liked Nancy: she was an american groupie with psychological problems and, on top of that, she makes him become a drug-addict. Few months after her death, Sid died of an heroin overdose (2nd February of 1979).

I try not to be like him though (I’m quite pessimst about my future but don’t really want to die at 22 from an heroin overdose...). Besides, I wear a padlock as a tribute to Sid – it’s a kind of lucky charm – the most often I can.

My fave old punk band is The SexPistols (God save the queen, Pretty Vacant, Silly Things...) but I also like The Clash (London calling, Should I stay or should I go, The magnificent 7...) who are more politically involved, The Ramones (Blitzkrieg Bop, Rock 'n' Roll High School, Judy is a punk...). 

But my favourite band EVER is Green Day.Punk defensers may be against Green Day, and blame them for being too commercial, but I still love them. Even if I agree that their music sounded more punk-rock in the early years than now. Nowadays, Green Day is more qualified like a “pop-punk” band (“pop” is here to remind us the commercial side). Regardless of their music genre, I love their lyrics (lyrical or involved), their music (loud or slow) and also the members Billie Joe Armstrong (guitarist), Mike Dirnt (bassist) and Tré Cool (drummer). If I had to tell my fave song, I would say “Basket Case”...This song is totally insane so, I’ll try to fix that with a lyrical song called “Wake me up when september ends”. The title comes from a real anecdote : when his father died, Billie Joe’s was only 10. He locked himself in his bedroom and when his mum went to take him back to the funeral, he anwered “Wake me up when september ends”.(His father died in September).

Obviously, they also wrote songs to denounce the american policy (mostly George W. Bush’s excesses and the war in Iraq) and also use punks’ main themes like the fight against the authority... :

American Idiot “Don’t want a nation under the new media”

Jesus of Suburbia : A kind of caricature of Jesus in our century (the one who plays St Jimmy/Jesus of suburbia in the video clip looks like Sid Vicious though)

21st century breakdown “My generation is zero” = linked with the “NO FUTURE” idea.

etc...

I found the punk way of thinking corresponding to mine. I didn’t adopt it; I already had my own way of thinking but couldn’t name it. The anarchy is one of the most extreme aspects but there’s some others like the anti-liberalism, pessimism about the mankind’s future or anti-fascism which I totally agree with.

Punk-rock helped me to stop being constantly ill-at-ease, even if I’m always like that but I hope it won’t last! Because now, I feel like if I was about to assume what I love and who I am.

Manon, 1ère L (equivalents: Year 12 in the UK//11th Grade or Junior in the USA. "L" stands for "Literary"course)