Do I Want To Remember?

Chapter 2

Bang. Bang. Bang.

"Izzy, wake up, honey! Please come and open the door and let me in! I'm here to check on you!"

Why is my mum here?

"Izzy! I knew I should have got a key cut for this flat," she mumbles. "Izzy! Get your arse down here right now! But please make sure you are wearing clothes! I love you and all but I don't think I can deal with that this early in the morning!"

I laugh. That is definitely not my mum. That's Leanne, my best friend from uni.

I roll onto my side and glance at the clock. 9.30. My gaze is attracted by the calendar on the wall. 2014. Did I really buy a calendar a year in advance? Where is my one for this year? This could really confuse me. I make a mental note to change it over at some point.

I throw on a dressing gown and make my way to the door.

"Oh good. You are still alive." I assume she's joking, but she doesn't laugh.

"Yep. I'm majorly hung-over, but I am alive. Last night must have been pretty full on," I laugh, and then regret it as my head begins to pound ferociously.

"Where did you go last night?"

"You mean where did we go last night? I imagine we went to a few different places, right? I didn't lose you, did I?" I ask, suddenly worried that I left her somewhere and now she's mad at me.

"I didn't go out with you last night."

"Of course you did. Graduation party!" I silently yell, doing a little victory dance as I walk down the corridor.

"Graduation party? Did you take a trip down memory lane or something? God, that seems like forever ago. A lot has changed since then." She looks down at the floor.

"A lot has changed since last night? Really? Like what?"

"What the fuck are you talking about, Izzy? We graduated a year ago. What is wrong with you? I know life was a million times better back then, but you can't just pretend like the last year hasn't happened." Seeing my face, which I can't imagine looks any better than purely horrified, she asks "Are you okay, honey? You really don't look well."

We both make our way over to the sofa to sit down, mainly because I am so confused I am afraid I will faint.

"A year ago?"

"Yeah, honey. What's the matter with you? Did Brad stay here last night?" She sounds very worried. How does she know who Brad is? More importantly, how does Brad know who I am?

I feel a single tear begin to fall down my face, and, within a split second, Leanne has her arms around me and is rocking me back and forth. This feels really familiar, like it has happened many times before. But I can't remember ever crying in front of her at uni. I never had anything to cry about really. My life was great. Why has everything changed all of a sudden?

"Leanne, are you sure the graduation party was a year ago?"

"Of course I am, honey. That is when we graduated." She stares at me, not like I've gone mad, but with the same pure worry that my mum used to give me whenever I would cry myself to sleep in her arms.

"Then I don't remember the last year of my life."