10 things I hate about you - Hotchniss

easy is boring

This chapter is dedicated to @prentissstwin, happy birthday! <3

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"You love me?"

"Of course I do", Aaron snapped. "You drive me insane, and mad! I hate it that you smoke and drink so much, I hate the way you treat all the other agents or that you're always unfriendly to people you don't know. I hate that you never care, and yes - I  hate that you're friends with Jason again. Hell, it drives me so damn mad! But all of this shit is irrelevant because I love you, and I cannot change that!"

"Well, same goes for you!", Emily exclaimed.

"What?!", he looked at her in confusion.

"Do you know how much I hate the way you're always so unemotional? Or that you doubt every person you don't know, and even the ones you know? I could list a billion things I hate about you, but what I hate the most is the fact that I cannot change the fact that I love you!", she hissed. "God, that was so cheesy! Ugh!"

They remained silent for a few seconds, maybe even minutes, just staring at each other. Neither of them realized that they had just admitted their love for the other for the first time, no, they were both too mad to do so.

"Maybe we should take a break then", Aaron finally sighed.

Emily looked at him in shook. This was not the way she had expected this to go. "Are you being serious?", she whispered.

"Yes, I am", he nodded. "Don't you realize we're toxic? We've been together for barely a month and both of us are already exhausted."

"But I thought we loved each other?", she asked, sounding like a little child.

"We do, hell, we do", he exclaimed. "And that's the problem. If we didn't love each other, we'd hate each other to death. That's the definition of being toxic, and it's bad for both of us. Taking a break may help us."

"For how long?", she mumbled.

"A week? Maybe two?", he looked at her, unsure about the whole thing.

"If that's what you want", she sighed and looked down.

"I don't want this, Emily", Aaron replied. "Don't make it look like I'm begging you for a break."

"It was your idea."

"Yes, because I want to fix our relationship", he explained.

"That sounds like we've been married for ages", Emily rolled her teary eyes.

"Maybe that's because our relationship is that important to me", the agent sighed.

Great silence surrounded them again, neither of them had anything left to say. Everything had been said.

After a while, Emily took a look at her watch. "Miller is going to be back soon", she said dryly. "I guess you should leave then."

"Okay", he nodded, but they both didn't move. It was too hard, since they had no idea when they would talk again, when this 'break' would end.

"What are you waiting for?", she hissed. "Go!"

"I -", he began, but he didn't find any words. Letting out another sigh, he left her room.

Filled with anger and sadness Emily smashed her fist against the wall and bit on her lip to suppress a whimper of pain. She had never been in this situation before, never felt this way before. What would happen after this 'break'? Would they find their way back together again?

She wiped away the tears as she heard a knock on the door.

"What?", she yelled.

"I'm back", Miller stuttered on the other side of the door. "Are there any plans for tonight?"

Emily thought for a second. "Yes, I'm going out. You're coming with me but will outside. Pick me up at 7."

"Okay", he replied and she heard how he walked away. Thank God, for him being so easy to control, she thought.

She didn't feel like partying at all, but she wanted to drink. A lot, actually. She wanted to get wasted, she hadn't felt this need ever since she had been with Aaron. But now, that everything was a mess, she was craving for it.

Emily opened all windows in her room to get as much fresh air as possible, before lighting up a cigarette. 'I hate it that you smoke and drink so much', she heard Aaron's voice in her head. At first, she hesitated.

"Oh, screw you, break-taker", she then whispered to herself and drew on the cigarette. As the smoke filled her lungs, she calmed a bit down. Everything on her mind was spinning, she couldn't even form one clear thought.

As the evening rolled around, she got ready for the night. Jason had informed her that they would go to a club close to her, and she had decided to join her friends. Putting on a black jeans shorts and a silver cropped-top and the fitting make-up, she looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was falling over her shoulders in natural, soft curls.

Internally, she was hoping that Aaron would see her when she'd leave. It was her way of coping with all that pain in her chest, provoking him. And a way to numb the pain was drinking and smoking, partying as much as possible and hoping that all that would help her to feel nothing at all anymore.

Her heart was shattered, she already missed him, but she was way too proud to ever openly admit that.

On time, she walked out of her room, where Agent Miller was already waiting.

"Ready?", he asked.

"Would I stand here if I wasn't?", Emily snapped.

"No, er, I -", the young agent immediately stammered.

"Shut up", she rolled her eyes and walked past him. He followed her quickly.

Aaron had just left the ambassadress' office as he discovered her and Miller, walking down the main stairs. A lump formed in his throat as he took a look at her outfit. She knew how good she looked, and she probably also knew that it was killing him. She was his, her heart belonged to him, but in this moment, Aaron just felt powerless.

He chewed his inner cheek and looked after her until she had left the building. Letting out a breath he didn't knew he was holding, he made his way to Wilson's office in order to talk about Elizabeth Prentiss' newest plans concerning events and security.

_

It was already 1:30 am and the mansion had fallen entirely fallen silent and dark. Only Aaron was still sitting in Wilson's office, alone, 'working'. He was waiting for Emily to return, to see if she was okay.

It felt like he was waiting for something that wasn't going to happen and he was getting slightly impatient. Walking up and down the office, he kept his eyes fixed on the window.

Suddenly, his phone rang. His heart skipped a beat as he read 'Agent Miller'. Did something happen?

"Hotchner?", he snapped.

"Sorry for bothering you that late", Miller yelled. Loud music was playing in the background. "But I need your help."

"Is Emily alright?", Hotch asked, panic shooting through his veins.

"No", Miller sighed. "She's totally drunk and has already thrown up a few times. I wanted to drive her to a hospital, since this really looks like an alcoholic poisoning, but she only mumbled that her mother shouldn't find out and that I should call you instead."

"Why didn't you keep an eye on what she was drinking?!", Aaron exclaimed.

"She told me to wait outside!"

"God, you're so stupid", he snapped. "I'll be right there. Where are you right now?"

"Heat Wave Club.", the younger agent mumbled, cleary scared.

"Don't you dare to loose her out of sight again until I'm there, or you're dead!", Aaron threatened. "I'll be there in 5!"