Snowflake

Lost

Dear Journal,
My name is Snowflake, Snowflake Solstice,I am an African-American who has blue white snowy hair and black/brown eyes based on my emotions. I am a very confusing teen growing up I had a friend,his name is Hope he leaves alot. I'm gonna miss all my friends they were my chosen family even through all the arguments we still came back together we always had each other's back. We laughed, we yelled, and even cried together. We never let a boy ruin our friendship we always said "Sisters before misters," I chose them over anything. I always act like nothing effects me ,but the truth is I'm a coward. Everything effects me, everything scares me;people make me nervous any sudden movement or noise make me cry.When people smile at me I question it cause nobody couldn't be so happy I try to show people my true self ,but they get worried because I put up a happy nothing fears me wall.
Everybody would rather see a lie then the truth. Every one wants love they think it's all happy and rainbows, love is painful. What is love without pain and suffering? Is it everything you ever hoped it would be? Do you feel like all the stars are closer? Why is it that when a relationship ends his/her voice is all you hear and everyone looks like him like you try to forget them ,but he takes your every thought. Then you see them looking lonely and you think if they are thinking the same. Another thing that makes me question my universe, is why does one word can make someone happy or sad immediately?Like tell a little kid there is candy it makes them happy tell an old person they are going to die it makes them sad. What if I tried these methods on people would it make any difference or keep them feeling the same way. I wonder well like my dad said "Every wonder is a thought and every thought has to be tested or your just a fool,"
Talk to you later,
Snowflak Solstice