Big Time

Twelve

The telephone can be an instrument of torture in the hands of a member of the opposite sex.

John forced himself to wait 24 hours before calling, but it was a struggle. That day at work, he hemmed and hawed as to whether to call her so soon.

I should call now so she knows it was more than a one-night stand.

Don’t do it. She’ll think you’re desperate and you’ll scare her off.

Half an hour later, he had the same conversation with himself again.

I wonder if she’s been out with Ray? Why wouldn’t she—we aren’t exclusive. If I don’t call, it might push her toward him.

Penny put another message from Rasha on his desk.

Just play it cool. She slept with you, for God’s sake. Of course she’s interested.

John finally caved and left her a message. As the hours ticked by, he struggled to concentrate on work. His heart skipped a beat each time his phone rang, only to result in disappointment when it turned out to be a work call. When he left the office that night, he hoped he had a message waiting for him at home. After racing up the stairs to his apartment, he was dejected to find no messages on his answering machine.

I could call Michael and get her home number from Sarah …

Pursuing someone was a fine balancing act. Pursuing someone you really liked, though, was like balancing on a rocking horse with extra pounds in one hand.

When Barbara didn’t call the next day, John was glum. He called Mac and organized drinks for Friday night. He’d been hoping to take Barbara out, but at this point he was starting to doubt if he’d hear from her again.

Maybe she was seeing Ray. Or playing hard to get?

John decided he better call Rasha back. He felt guilty but also pressured; everyone appeared to want a piece of him right now and there wasn’t enough to go around. He went into an empty meeting room where he could speak in private.

“Hey, how are,” he said after she answered the phone.

“Oh, so-so …”

“Yeah?”

“Work,” she said. “It was a full house last night.”

“I can relate,” said John.

“You took a long time to call me.”

John’s heart sank. He knew he needed to end this but hated these conversations. He always felt like the bad guy.

“I need to know if you are serious about me.”

John cringed. “Well …” How to explain.

“I do not want to come over just for sex.”

“Look kid, I think you’re great. But work’s amazingly demanding right now and it’s killing me. I’m just trying to keep my head above water.”

Rasha was silent and John sensed her frustration.

“Look, I like you, but the last few nights you’ve slept over have been a little weird. We’re going to have to see how things work out.”

“So you are saying that you want more than just sex?”

John swallowed his guilt and tried to do the same with his temptation. “Rasha, all of my energy is going into fixing a problem I’ve got at work at the moment. So to be honest, I really haven’t been thinking seriously about us.” But he wasn’t being honest and felt bad.