Papilio Effectus (Until Dawn Josh X Reader)

Part 10: No Room for Doubt

(A/N:  So, yeah, it's been a while since I've updated.  I mentioned in my other story that I hit a writer's block and it sucked.  But I feel like I can make up for it...with two chapters today.  Also, this is the ring Josh gave (Y/n). If you'd like something different that's cool, but I love rose gold.)

~~~Josh's POV~~~

I slipped out of bed quietly, trying not to disturb (Y/n) from her sleep.  She looked so peaceful and happy there.  We'd stayed up pretty late celebrating our engagement.  I'd video chatted my parents to give them the good news, since they were away yet again.  They were thrilled and happy that I'd found someone who could help balance the mess in my head.  I'd also started going back to Dr. Hill, at (Y/n)'s insistence.  After I'd tried to hurt myself, she wasn't about to take the chance that something could happen now that we were engaged.

Marriage...what a crazy thing.  I mean, yeah, I was 21 and she would be soon also, but that's a strange thing to think about.  I knew I didn't want to be with anyone else, but forever...is a long-ass time.

I decided to make some breakfast and surprise (Y/n) with breakfast in bed.  After all we'd been through, she deserved much more than that.  I went to the fridge and grabbed bacon, eggs and butter, then grabbed the bread from the box on the counter.  I pulled a frying pan from the rack and started cooking the bacon.  I put the coffee machine on as well.

~~~Your POV~~~

I turned over in bed and stretched my arms out.  It was then I noticed I was alone in the bed.  I rolled onto my back and caught the scent of two of the most wonderful things...coffee and bacon.  I stretched and crawled out of bed to see Josh standing in front of the stove.  "Morning sunshine."

He turned and waved the spatula at me.  "No.  You get your sexy ass back into that bed.  Now."

I walked up to him and kissed his cheek.  "Oh...well if you're gonna be so demanding..."  I smacked his ass as I walked away and back to the bedroom.  Turning the TV on, I started watching some random movie while I waited.  A few moments later, Josh returned with a tray.  He set it in front of me with a cheesy grin. 

"Good morning, future Mrs. Washington."  He sat on the bed next to me and kissed my cheek.  I laughed a bit and picked up a piece of toast, dipping it in the runny egg yolk.  Josh had gotten better at cooking lately, which was a relief.  At least I knew it wasn't going to be takeout or me cooking for the rest of our lives.  I looked at him, slightly concerned.

"Are you sure this is what you want?  I mean, marriage is a big step, and we're both pretty young and..."

"Yes.  I mean, we don't have to get married right away.  We should both finish school, get good jobs, all that happy shit first.  I just...wanted to be sure this was what you wanted before moving forward."

"Why wouldn't I want this?"  I picked up a piece of bacon and gnawed it absentmindedly as I waited for his response.

"I don't know...after everything I've done, especially in the last year, I don't see how anyone would want to spend their life with me."  He twiddled his thumbs a bit and looked at me, biting his lower lip.  "I'm not stable.  I've hurt myself, and tried to hurt others.  If I were you, I'd have run months ago."

I moved the tray to the floor, then turned and grabbed Josh's hands.  "Look at me, Josh."  He looked at me, his hazel eyes looking into my (E/c) ones as I smile at him.  "I wouldn't have stayed if I didn't know what I was getting into.  You've been through so much, and I want to take care of you.  I want to make a life with you, have a family, grow old with you."  I leaned in and kissed him softly.  Resting my forehead against his, I whispered,  "We're going to be fine."  He smiled and kissed me again before getting out of the bed and walking to the dresser to find clothes.  I got up as well and dug through my drawer.