Chasing a Broken Butterfly

Things are Changing: Chapter 8

My eyes snap open and I jolt awake. I turn my head to the left towards the small alarm clock I have on my dresser. The time reads 3 am. I've been asleep for about 4 hours or so. Give or take. I look down and see Lacey curled up on her mat. She looks so peaceful.

I sit up in confusion, trying to figure out why I woke up. I'm one of the deepest sleepers in the world, so it's hard to wake me up. That's when I notice my skin is covered in goosebumps and look up to find it's source.

My window is wide open...

My white curtains are rippling with the gentle force of the wind. I remain frozen in my bed for a minute.

Did I do that?

I couldn't have...unless I was sleep walking.

But I don't sleep walk...

There's always a first, I tell myself

I reach over to my bedside table and grab my hearing aid and put it on before stepping out of bed and head toward the window.

I poke my head out and look around. There's nothing out of the ordinary. I pull my head back in and I'm more confused than ever.

I close my window and lock it. I normally don't lock my window because I'd always figured that a robbery is next to impossible to do on the second floor. I'd still like to think that, so I convince myself that I must've sleep walked and opened my window. It's the only thing that makes sense. And to be honest, I'd rather not think about other scarier possibilities. I'm already alone tonight.

I walk back over to my bed and slip back under the covers, this time making the blankets cover up to my nose. It's what I do when I'm even a little afraid. Before I overthink it I hop out of bed to turn the lock on my bedroom door. I know it's silly, but it makes me feel safe. I quickly jump back into bed, and take my hearing aid off.

As soon as I take the device off, silence cuts into me deep. Nothing is audible. The rustling of my blankets as I turn is completely gone. My breathing is muted and the humming of the air conditioning has disappeared. The only sound I have with me now is the voice inside of my head and the rhythmic beating of my heart. But even then it sounds distant...

I had always liked the comfort of not having to hear anything when asleep. It made me immune to nightmarish imaginations that involved floorboards creaking, or winds howling against the wind. So far, that's the only benefit I have in my hearing impairment.

But tonight, it makes me feel even more vulnerable than ever. So I grab the device and put it back on. The humming air comes back to life, I can faintly hear my own breathing, and as I turn I can hear my bed creak.

If I sleep with it on tonight maybe I will be able to hear myself get up if sleepwalking overtakes me again...or in the worst case scenario, if someone tries to break in, I hope I'll be conscious enough to decipher the noise...

Being a victim of hearing loss has made it nearly impossible for my brain to quickly register sounds and associate them with the correct objects. I only pray that tonight, I would act quick if the worst case happens. But that's why I have Lacey here with me. She will help me and so help me god, I should be able to hear her bark with the stupid thing on...

Those are the last thoughts I have before sleep overtakes me again...

The next morning I am stirred awake by a faint buzzing sound.

What the hell is that coming from?

I rub my eyes and glance over at my night table and notice that my phone is lit up, buzzing like crazy.