The Budapest Objective

Eight

An hour later, Victor Black was on his way back to the SHIELD Helicarrier, and Natasha and Clint were alone again. Natasha was looking through the files she and Clint had been given, glancing occasionally at her partner. She was still in her blue dress, although Clint had changed into a t-shirt and shorts. They both hated being really dressed up, but Natasha just didn't feel like changing.

Clint was staring into space, trying to figure out what would happen if Victor Black turned out to be telling the truth. If he was, then Clint was really in for it. But he wasn't going to pull out. At least, not without Natasha.

Natasha thought she'd risk asking Clint about William Cross. "Clint."

He didn't appear to have heard her.

"Clint?"

Still, no response.

"Clint!"

"What?" he asked, finally coming out his daydream.

"Who's William Cross? These files aren't very helpful."

Clint took a deep breath. "William Cross, A.K.A. Crossfire is a former CIA agent. Some say he's mad, but I think he's a misunderstood genius. He's a friend of Trick Shot's. Sniper, assassin, and hand-to-hand combat expert."

"How do you know him?" Natasha looked up from the file she was holding, and right at Clint, trying to read his expression.

"We met at SHIELD. He was sent there to inspect Nick Fury and a few Level Seven agents."

"Did he inspect you?"

"No, I was only Level Six at the time. Anyway, I caught him sneaking around the base when I was on guard duty. I caught him, and turned him in."

"Where was he?"

"Secure Weapons Vault. Trying to hack in. Put up a heck of a fight before I could call for backup; he probably would've killed me if agent Coulson hadn't gotten there so fast. Even then he nearly wiped the ground with us. Agent Hill showed up next. Man, that girl can fight! Sharp shooter, too."

Natasha found herself feeling slightly jealous of Clint talking so highly of Agent Hill. Which was ludicrous. There'd have to be something there in the first place for her to feel like this...

"Nick Fury himself showed up after Hill. The fighting stopped. Then Cross went into this rant about how SHIELD agents shouldn't attack inspectors and how he was going to report us to the head of the CIA. It didn't take long before Fury realized what had happened, though. Coulson and Hill cleared up any doubts he had.

"Sneaking around somewhere like SHIELD without specific authorization is a huge offense. They had a hearing in the Supreme Court. I was the main witness, because I was the one who'd seen him trying to hack into a secure section of the base. He was cleared, but you can imagine how the CIA felt about that embarrassment. They fired him.

"I, on the other hand, got promoted to Level Seven a few months later because of that. I didn't see Cross until only about a month before I met you. That time didn't turn out so well. I was still sort of inexperienced in the field, and having to fight someone like Cross wasn't good. He almost killed me. Said he blamed me for getting fired, that he'd still have a job if not for me. He didn't seem too bad off, though.

"Cross is an expert in weapons of all kinds. He's not someone you want as an enemy."

"What happened? The second time, I mean," Natasha asked.

"He jumped me. I obviously didn't think he was still around. I wasn't expecting to have to fight him." Clint sighed deeply. "I don't think I've ever been in so much pain..."

"What happened?"

"I couldn't take him. I just wasn't good enough. I've never been so close to death... Agent Coulson brought the team in at the last second. The last I saw of him was a fleeting glimpse as he made a run for it as the SHIELD crew came in, then I blacked out. The team caught him, and he went to the Vault, a high security prison for the most human enemies, most of which rely on tech."

"I know what the Vault is, Clint."

Clint smirked. "Well, if I'm gonna tell this story, then I'm going to tell it for all it's worth."

"Sorry. What happened next?"

"That's it, I guess. I was in the infirmary for 11 days, and the next mission I went on I met you. You pretty much know the rest."

Natasha though for a few minutes. "So, this guy's mad at you because you got him fired from the CIA?"

"Yep."

"Why?"

"I guess because he could've gotten a ton of information on stuff without looking sketchy."

"Yeah, that makes sense." She thought for a few minutes. "Hey, Clint, why don't you pull out? It could get pretty ugly if Crossfire knows you're here. I can take care of it; why don't you just go back to the Helicarrier?"

Clint looked at her incredulously. "You too, huh?"

"What?"

"I may be many things, Natasha, but a coward isn't one of them! I'm not pulling out because some guy almost killed me."

"Clint, I know you're not a coward, but you're also not stupid. You should know when to-"

"If you were in my place, would you give up and go back to the Helicarrier?"

"Of course I would-"

"Don't lie to me, Natasha."

Natasha hesitated, seeing the dangerous look in his eyes. "No," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "No, I wouldn't."

"Then don't tell me to pull out."

Natasha sighed, closing the files and standing up. "Well, I think I'm going to bed. I'm tired, and tomorrow will likely be exciting."

"K. Goodnight, Natasha."

"Goodnight."

"Hey," Clint stopped her as she reached the door. "If you have another nightmare, and if your screaming doesn't wake me up," he'd meant it seriously, but Natasha made a face. "then feel free to wake me up anyways. I don't mind talking about it, if you want to get it off your chest."

Natasha stood there for moment, not moving, barely breathing. Finally, she broke free of Clint's grip on her shoulder, and said, "No, it's fine, Barton. You wouldn't understand, anyway."

She turned and went back to her room, leaving him standing there. She undressed quickly, got into a t-shirt and pajama pants, and crawled into bed, knowing she wouldn't be able to sleep.

Natasha thought for a long time about what she'd done; what she'd done to deserve the guilt and shame that now possessed her. She felt a large tear trickle down her cheek.

"You wouldn't understand, anyway"!? Clint thought, frustrated at the minuet level of confidence that his partner put in him. Did she really think that he didn't understand her? That was the whole reason he'd spared her life, because he understood where she was coming from.

He knew that she couldn't keep this to herself forever. She'd need to talk to someone sooner or later...

Or would she? This was, after all, the Black Widow. Would she ever truly admit to needing someone? Probably not, Clint thought. But still, why didn't she see that he was there for her? Why couldn't she understand that he wanted to help her? Why, for God's sake, couldn't she see that he loved her...?