Malec Shorts (TMI Fanfic)

Falling

The tears fell in small droplets on to the down comforter on the old worn bed. The once grey blanket had turned an almost black shade from the wetness that had formed below him. His black hair had not been brushed and sat a top his head haphazardly, sticking up in random places. His deep blue eyes glistened with fresh tears threatening to spill over his pale eyelids and dark lashes. Alec sat cross legged on the bed, his phone in front of him. He would reach for it, open it, stare at the screen and then close it, setting it down on the bed again. His rune scarred hands clenched and unclenched. The nervousness clear in everything he did. His heart felt like it had been ripped apart, torn to pieces, stomped on and then thrown into the garbage. He felt like he was missing a whole part of him. Alec had spent the last two days in his room at the institute. He never bothered to come out even for Jace and Izzy who spent hours banging and pleading for him to come out. There was only one person who he wanted to talk to, and that person wanted nothing to do with him anymore. He'd made that clear in the tunnel. "Aku cinta kamu." Magnus had said that he loved Alec. But it wasn't enough. Alec couldn't blame him. Alec had been wrong. It was terrible what he had done. He had lost one of the only people he deeply cared about. He sank back against his pillow and cried. His thin and muscular body wracked with terrible sobs that shook his entire being. But eventually, he fell asleep.

An arm snaked around his shoulders pulling him closer to the older boy. The blue haired boy planted a kiss on the shadowhunters cheek.

"Enjoying the view my love?" Magnus asked as he snuggled closer to Alec.

"It's mesmerizing." The young boy marveled at the Paris landscape out their hotel balcony.

"Kind of like you." The warlock whispered pulling Alec back inside the room.

His black hair was down, not spiked like usual. His caramel colored face bore no make up what so ever. All the eyeliner and eyeshadow was stripped making his green gold cat eyes look bare. He looked like a complete different person. All the glitter was gone. He wasn't feeling very sparkly. He trudged through his loft and plopped down on the green settee in the living room. Chairman Meow hopped right up next to him and rubbed his small head up the warlocks leg.

"I know you miss Alec. Don't we all. Stop moping. He's just a stupid Shadowhunter." Magnus said bitterly waving his hand, calling a warm cup of coffee to his hands. Alec had always hated when he stole but Alec wasn't here now was he.

As much as Magnus wouldn't admit it, he needed Alec next to him. He longed to feel Alec's arms around him. He longed to kiss the Shadowhunters soft lips. He wanted to feel all the young boys scars on his arms and chest and stomach. But Alec had hurt him beyond forgiveness. Magnus couldn't believe what the Shadowhunter had done. The warlock sipped the coffee slowly. The vision of Alec brewing coffee in the mornings flashed behind his eyes. The young boy burning his arm on the pot, yelling and cursing. Magnus set his coffee down and stood up slowly. He needed to get his mind off of the Shadowhunter.

The cold air surrounded the boy as he stepped out into the empty street. He was lost in his thoughts. He was useless. He thought of all the things he had messed up. His blue eyes were clouded with tears yet to fall and his pale cheeks were stained with the tears that had already fallen. The black haired boy stumbled into the alley and collapsed against the wall. He needed something. He needed to feel something. He was completely empty. The blue haired boy appeared behind the shadowhunters closed eyes. The warlock disappeared as Alec opened his eyes. He climbed to his feet and moved off the wall. He could see Magnus's loft across the street. He could see the light on in the living room. The room were he used to curl up next to the older boy. He could picture the bed where he shared his intimacy for the first time. He bit down hard on his lip to keep from crying. The taste of blood flooded his mouth. He didn't care anymore. He resolved to feel something.

He climbed to the top of Magnus's loft building. The roof was bare except for a few stray twigs and leaves. The young boy stepped to the edge of the building and peered out at the city. The roof wasn't high but it was high enough for Alec. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in. "I love you Magnus." He whispered barely choking out the words. And with that he jumped. He closed his eyes and in that moment he felt something. He felt relief. He felt at peace. The last tear escaped his eye as he hit the ground.

"Sometimes I wish for falling

Wish for the release

Wish for falling through the air

To give me some relief

Because fallings not the problem

When I'm falling I'm at peace

It's only when I hit the ground

That causes all the grief"

-Florence and the Machine