Secret Desire

Chapter Thirty Nine- "Please."

 Chapter Thirty Nine.

"Please."

Justin’s Point Of View

Two Hours Earlier.

 

             The streets of Clayton, North Carolina were once the streets I had hated the most. I used to hate walking these goddamn sidewalks, not knowing where they’d lead or whom they’d bring. I never pictured myself to like it here but here I am walking the same streets that once drove me crazy, but instead I’m walking them thinking about the girl that I am madly in love with.

             There’s never been a time in my life that I have ever thought about a girl without picturing them on the pole or on the cover of a magazine. I never thought about a girl more than just an object or a whore. But the day I met this stubborn, crazy, and insane girl Bella was the day I changed my ways and that is something I will never be able to explain to anyone.

            This past week in Arizona has just opened up my eyes to so many things. For one, I’ve never thought about the future at any point in time but the moment Bella and I were in that god-forsaken tub I started to think about ours. That’s the scary thing. I wasn’t thinking about mine, I was thinking about ours.

            I let my mind wander to where it never has been before that night and I started to think about our life when we graduated high school and when we would get married. I’ve never even thought about marriage until she walked in. I know we haven’t known each other that long and I know some might say we took it way too fast and I can’t blame them because we did take it too fast.

            But that’s our generation now. We, as teenagers, fall for someone way too fast without thinking about the outcome. In my opinion we can’t change how we feel and in some unexplainable way I think that’s what is the most unique about us as humans. We can’t stop the way our heart wants us to feel so some people try to hide this fact and they try to put off those feelings. At first when I met her, that’s exactly what I wanted to do. I wanted to stay away from her and never see her again so that stupid feeling in my heart that I got wouldn’t happen again. But then our mind works in mysterious ways as well. It runs and runs and it won’t stop running until you finally just say, dammit okay, you win. So you end up following your heart after your mind keeps annoying you and then you end up happier than you ever thought you would be. That, I think, is incredible and I wouldn’t change what has happened between Bella and I for the world.

            As my feet hit the familiar sidewalk that I usually walk, I heard something behind me but when I turned my back to look nothing was there. Thinking it was an animal or something, I continued on my way to the flower spot where I usually go to think at night. Ever since I took her there I just wanted to be there with her again. I wanted to make love to her again in those flowers and see those gorgeous blue eyes of hers stare into mine as I gave every ounce of feeling I had towards her. I wanted to show her how much I was in love with her and how I’d never ever let her go.

            As soon as I was in the flowers, I pulled out my phone to text her until I felt a punch to my side and fell to the ground. The pain was radiating throughout my whole entire stomach and all I could think of was how much I wanted to beat the crap out of whoever did that.

            When I looked up to see who had done it I felt like I just had gotten kicked in the gut again when Roger was looking down at me with a gun pointed directly in my direction.