An Inheritance

Chapter 26

“As for myself, I couldn’t tell you until you were ready to learn about yourself.  In my family, it’s mostly the men who possess this ‘gift’, most named ‘Wendell’.  Although all of my brothers and sisters have some type of a talent, I was the one who received more than my share, so here I am, Wendell Samuel Deveaux.  I was like your mother; I didn’t want anything to do with it at a certain point.  It was too hard to know things; it was too hard to bear this responsibility.  But knowing your grandmother, a woman who so unselfishly gave herself to this ‘gift’ and to this community, how could I sit back and not want to help?”

 “So, you’ve known all of your life that you had this extra sense?  That what was going on in your head wasn’t your imagination, but a ‘gift’?”  Sam nodded his head.  “Well, all of my life I’ve felt there was something wrong with me.  Something that just wasn’t right.  I’ve fought these feelings, these ‘silent voices’ in my head for so long, I’ve learned to suppress them and ignore them.”

“I don’t think you’re giving yourself enough credit.  I bet throughout your life you’ve followed those internal voices without ever recognizing them for what they were.  Suppressing the knowledge of what your instincts are, in no way has suppressed what those gifts have given you and what you have done with them.  I bet you wouldn’t even have to think very hard to recall events that prove what I’ve just said is true.”  Sam paused as he looked at her.  “And by your silence, I’m assuming I’m right. 

“Your grandmother told me so much about you, that I knew more about you than you did before starting to read those letters.  You have a wonderful gift but it’s yours to fully use or not, that is completely your decision.”

Lauren got up and pulled the chocolate pecan pie out of the refrigerator.  It was now her turn to figure out exactly what to say.  Returning to the table, she placed the pie slices in front of them, then looked Sam in the eye.  “Okay then.  Tell me what it’s like to fully possess these abilities, tell me how you’ve handled knowing things in a way that others could never know.  Tell me what’s it like being one of us.”

Sam stared at her for a moment.  “It’s the best gift and the worst curse.  It’s satisfaction in knowing you can help others and devastation when you know you can’t.  There are days when I’m on a high and feel blessed and there are days when I wish I hadn’t gotten out of bed.  Days?  Hell, sometimes it fluctuates from hour to hour.  But once I decided to completely accept my abilities, I’ve never looked back.  Never.”

Sam told her about his growing up knowing he had all of these senses.  His mother helped him keep it sorted out and keep his feet on the ground.  Having siblings that had a varying degree of abilities also helped out.  He never felt he was alone or ‘strange’.  His mother had dreams and visions that Lauren’s grandmother helped her with.  His eldest sister, Trish, had the ‘healing way’ and spent several summers with her grandmother; she became a nurse, married a doctor and moved to Mississippi where she and her husband run a clinic.  One brother was a psychologist, another one a professor and the youngest brother was ‘still finding his way’.   His other sister became a botanist and worked for an organic farming co-op.

“With all those connections to my grandmother and you told me you had never met her?”

 Sam looked sheepish.  “What was I supposed to tell you?  That I spent weekends and summers with your grandmother, honing my abilities while she helped me work through things that I ‘saw’?  Telling you I really didn’t know her was only a white-lie.  I felt I couldn’t tell you how close we were until you found out more about her and yourself.”

Lauren shook her head disapprovingly, but with a small smile. 

“But everything else was true.  When in high school I felt I didn’t want to be different, I wanted to fit in with my school mates.  My life revolved around basketball and friends.  I stopped visiting your grandmother, tried to cut it all off.  But I still had those gifts and the incident that drove your mother away, happened to me many times.  Maybe not as drastic, but guys being guys, I knew what trouble my friends were getting into and the end results.   Believe me; I didn’t want that knowledge or responsibility.

“I went to college still trying to ignore those gifts, but when I reconnected with your grandmother at that lecture, I knew what I was meant to do.  I took that path and here I am, not one regret.  I love teaching.  My instincts and abilities are needed to help these kids begin a worthwhile life.  It’s my firm belief that many of these young people would not reach their potential if I couldn’t guide them with the help of my gifts.”

 Lauren was silent.  “When will I know what is meant for me?  Am I to follow in my grandmother’s steps?  Or find something totally different?  What if I don’t want to follow any path using these gifts?” 

 “You’ll know, believe me you’ll know.  Think about it, look into yourself, and you’ll know what is right for you.  You’re the only one who can determine that.”

Sam then went on to tell Lauren about some of the trials and tribulations of using his own gifts.  Some were poignant, some sad, but many were absolutely hilarious.  The times, especially in his teen years, where he misread what his senses were telling him were often funny.  More often than not it involved one girl or another that he was interested in at the time.  “ … I know it’s hard to believe, seeing this rock-solid confident man before you, that I was a bashful, timid, tongue-tied teenager when it came to girls.  With my hormones raging, it was difficult to read what my abilities were trying to tell me, and sometimes I would just completely ignore them …”.

They sat and talked for almost two hours until Sam got up saying he had a test to grade.

As Sam opened the door, he put his arms around Lauren and kissed her on the check.  “I don’t want you to have to do this alone.  I’m here, and along with Odilia and Sarah, we will help you every step of the way, if that’s what you want.  Just take some time to think about it, listen to yourself.  It will all become clear.”

Lauren watched as Sam got into his truck and leaned out the window.  “Three o’clock on Saturday.  Casual.  I’ll take you to one of my favorite restaurants later.”  He smiled and drove back down the drive. 

What the hell?  Another kiss on the cheek?  I had so hoped we would be further along than that by now. 

Lauren closed the door and sank into the couch.  Abby jumped up beside her and Lauren looked gratefully at her as she stroked her fur.  “Abby, I’m more confused now than I’ve ever been.  Nothing is what it seemed when I first got down here.  I’m torn between finding out more about my abilities and running home to my condo and hiding under my bed’s covers.  I can no longer deny what’s been going on in me, but am I ready to take on all of these responsibilities?  Abby, what am I going to do?”

Abby looked up at her and meowed silently.  Then turning around a few times, she snuggled next to Lauren’s thigh and purred.