"Defend Me, Attorney." (Law Series #1)

PART ONE: WHERE IT ALL STARTED

"Why not?" I asked. A mixture of love, pain, and fear could be seen in my eyes. "You know I like you, you want me too. So why not? Why make things complicated for us when everything is mutual?"

"It's not that easy," he said. His eyes started to be emotional. "I'm...too messed up."

"So what?" I asked. "You know I like messy things."

"You... You don't understand," he argued.

"Then make me understand," I eagerly replied.

"It won't make sense," he responded.

"Then make it makes sense."

He looked at my face again and he was probably looking for an escape. When he ensured that I won't let this go unless he'll give me a valid reason, Traise heaved a sigh.

"Sobrang gulo ng buhay ko," he started. "My family, my dad, even me, myself. My mind was exploited even at a very young age. I got all forms of beatings from dad that made me numb of it. I also saw how complicated life is for my mom, working her ass off 24/7. I saw how my dad abused her, time won't pass that she won't be getting a bruise or a slap."

It caught me off guard. I never knew that the reason could be this deep.

"See, Courtney? Kahit na gustong gusto kong subukan, I'm... I'm too complicated for you. I want the best for you but I will never be the best. I'm just...one of those filths that might ruin you. With the dirt in my hands, I don't wanna ruin you. You're too precious for that."

"Then I'll fix you," I said. "If you want, I'll hold your hand while you fix yourself. I can always wait, Traise. You know that," I said and my voice broke. I felt tears building up in my eyes. Desperate as it may seem but I don't care anymore.

"You have no idea of what you're saying. No one can save me," Traise said and he looked directly at my eyes. "Not even you."

That created a bang in my chest I couldn't handle.

"That's actually why I went here," he said and tears were visibly forming in his eyes too. "I'm saying goodbye."

My eyes grew bigger. "What... do you mean?"

He gave me a weak smile. "I know I've said goodbye for too many times, but this time... it's real."

Just then, his tears fell.

"Farewell, the best thing I never had," he said while looking at me. My tears fell on my cheeks. "'Til we meet again..."

In no time, he turned his back. I watched him as he walked away. It created a deep pierce in my heart both literally and figuratively.

In this melancholic moment, he came to me like a thief in the night, carrying my own heart with him as we parted ways.

I started to cry so hard that even my sight got blurry due to my tears. With my chest feeling a lethal pain, I turned my back as well.

I can't watch him slowly fading in the dark.

I just... can't.

I started to walk but just when I was about to reach our gate, I heard noises-really loud noises as if it was an emergency or something.

Bewildered, I looked back again and that was when my roots were about to disown me.

There were cars, plenty of them—which were police mobile cars and all the police came out from it. In my horror, they gathered around Traise and pointed their gun at him.

"PUT YOUR HANDS UP IN THE AIR!" one police said. "YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!"

My eyes widened.

WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?

Faster than I can, I ran in their direction but I was too late—he was caught and was pushed against the car as they tried to handcuff him with his hands on his back.

"You have the right to remain silent," the police said. "Anything you say can be used against you in court. You have the right to have a lawyer present during questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided to you if you wish. If you decide to answer questions now without a lawyer present, you have the right to stop answering at any time. Do you understand?"

I got stupefied. The next moment I knew, he was being arrested and was forced to go inside the car.

Just then, our eyes met.

He stopped, he smiled weakly, and he mouthed, "I love you..."

That broke me.

When the police car closed, things came clearer to me as if I just got splashed by cold water.

I tried to come near him hysterically but the police did not allow me. Until the car departed and I was left standing still while crying.

"Kakilala mo ba 'yun?" a police asked me, watching the car departing as well. "Grabeng bata. Nakakatakot!"

I looked at him, confused. "B-Bakit po?"

But what I heard left me dumbstruck.

"Pinatay ang sariling ama."