Watch It Fall || Ponyboy Curtis

Chapter 1

Ayla's POV-

I don't know what I expected to happen when that soc had me pinned against the locker. I knew I was in for it but I had no strength in me mentally to even whimper out in pain. I just stared straight ahead at nothing. I wouldn't give em the satisfaction.

"You hear me grease!" He grabbed my jaw now turning my face towards him. "You listen when I'm talking to you!" He spat. But still I said nothing, I did nothing, I just did nothing. "Leave her alone Freddie." Some soc girl told him.

Reluctantly he let me go. I stumbled back a bit but just shook it off. I walk to the nearest girls bathroom I had a migraine and needed to calm down. I stood in front of the lip gloss smudged mirror and looked at myself.

I was wearing a tee shirt, black jeans, and my dirty black converse. It was my go to outfit, I didn't have anyone to impressed and even if I did they probably wouldn't be. *Pluck*

I had curly dark brown hair that was in a side ponytail, big dark brown eyes, tan skin, dimples, and long eyelashes. That might sound pretty but it's not at least from what I've been told. Apparently my kind doesn't belong. I was Latina trash that phrase was stuck with me since the day I stepped foot in this town. *Pluck*

I never showed my emotions though. I learned to push them so far down I can't reach them. I was too depressed to give a damn. But in the middle of the night in complete darkness my mind would flood with hatful words. I wish I could turn it off but I've only found the temporary switch.

I dug through my book bag on the search for an Advil or something. I desperately needed it my head was pounding. I finally found it and took it. I hurried and put it away. I didn't trust myself with pills because I always had that thought in the back of my head. That said "Go on take a couple, maybe them all and overdose, you could be done with the torment."

But I know better then to listen to the devils dirty work. Instead I would pluck a rubber band on my wrist every time I thought bad about myself. leaving me with a bruised purple and blue ring around my wrist. It was better than cutting myself or something, right?

The next period bell rung so I hurried out of the bathroom and down the hall to Ms.H's class for science. The rest of the day went by as normal. Rude comments, shoulder checked, whispers, dirty looks, starving myself and skipping lunch, not saying one word in class. I skipped going to my locker because I knew some Super Soc trouble was probably waiting for me.

I left out of the schools side doors walking down the side walk towards my house. I kept my head down but who am I kidding I was easy to spot. I tired to keep to myself but I heard what sounded like a rubber ball. I looked up to see Ponyboy Curtis throwing a ball in the air and then catching it.

He changed so much from where I stand. Personally I've never talked to him but I knew his whole story. Two of his best friends died a few months back. I could see his depression from a mile away. He used to be so cheerful and energetic. But who am I to say I never said a word to that boy he probably didn't know who I-. Never mind everyone knows who I am The Latina Trash. *Pluck*

He must have heard my rubber band because he looked up and we made eye contact. I quickly looked back down. I wasn't exactly the most social seeing as I have no friend and all. But it truly didn't bother me I could manage on my own. I'd live. Even though I didn't exactly want to. *Pluck*

"What are you doing?" I looked up to see Ponyboy very confused looking at my rubber band. "Oh um its for my anxiety or um negative thoughts I guess." I tried to explain. I was mentally shocked at the state of my voice. I haven't heard it in a while and it sounded foreign.

"So if you think bad about your self you just Pluck it?" He asked trying to understand the concept. I nodded in response. "Can I see?" He started walking over to me. "Um I guess." I answered extending my arm. He gently held my wrist examining it. That soft touch was also foreign.

"Your whole wrist is bruised, your hurting yourself." He sounded a little panicked you could see it in his greenish grey eyes. "It helps and its better than other self harm." You defended. "But A your hurting yourself." He argued. I don't know how to describe the feeling I felt when he called me A. I don't think I've ever had a nickname that wasn't negative.

"A?" I asked forgetting all about to topic before. "Oh um yeah....can I call you that?" Pony nervously asked. I semi smiled and I haven't done that in a long time. "Sure, and I can call you pony right?" I shot the question right back.

He smiled and nodded his head yeah. Are we friends or was he just being nice. I didn't understand his concern for me or his sudden nicknaming me. But I wasn't complaining. We walked the rest of the way home in silence since we lived three houses down from each other. But still we never talked to each other ever until this day.

What changed? I'm not sure but I don't want to over think it. It's probably nothing major, I've learned not to get your hopes up the hard way.