Science-fiction short stories, mostly from the less-serious end of the spectrum. You'll find zombie presidents, talking sharks, world-endangering sub-woofers, coffee-toting terrorists, an unhealthy number of 80s references and a whole lot more. Th...
"And to celebrate clause 2.31 of the tax code, sir? The one that exempts ocean-borne dwellings from most state-based taxes? Along with clause 7.45, sub-section 3? The one that-"
"Jenkins, you're a real mood-killer, did you know that? Yes, I may be a few hundred million bucks better off than I would have been, if not for those clauses of yours. But really, what are a few hundred million dollars? What difference do they make, in the grand scheme of things?"
"Well, sir, they stopped you from going bankrupt."
"Yeah, I suppose. But on top of that one little side-bonus, there's so much more that the Aqua City will offer the human race. More living space, environmentally sustainable habitation, new fields of research, all that kind of crap. The sky's the limit."
"Actually, sir, the overdraft is the limit. And I need to talk to you about an extension. But on the topic of research, we're copping some grief from the ethics committee."
"Those clowns? I dunno, Jenkins, how's a man supposed to be a visionary, when narrow-minded idiots are forever getting in his way? What's up their butts?"
"Well, sir, they're claiming that approval for some of the research projects has been rushed through, in order to secure government funding. They say there's been a lack of ethical oversight, and that not all the projects are of genuine benefit to humanity."
"Ethical oversight? Genuine benefit? What a steaming load. Which projects are they bitching about?"
"Quite a few, sir. For example, there's the Lamnidae Vocalisation group."
"What's the problem with that one? A fine group of brilliant scientists, researching matters of vital importance to humanity. Obviously beneficial. Just remind me, what exactly is it that they're working on?"
"Talking sharks, sir."
"Talking what?"
"Sharks, sir."
"Sharks?"
"Yes, sir."
"Hmm. And they're teaching these sharks to do what, now?
"Talk, sir."
"Talking sharks, right. Love it, love it, love it. Obviously beneficial. Tell those ethics clowns to pull their heads out of their arseholes, and pay this Laminated Volcano group a visit. Then they can see for themselves how well we're spending the government's money."
"Sir, don't you mean how well they're spending the government's money?"
"Exactly, Jenkins. Exactly."
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In a spacious research-lab, on the edge of the Aqua City, open to the blue sky and lapped by the azure waters of the Pacific, a bespectacled, besuited bureaucrat is being given a tour of the facilities.
