One Day At a Time

Day one; month one

RECAP;
Ruth, was born in Doncaster, England, when she was 16 her and her parents moved to Florida, America, to find one of the best known doctors in the cancer area. Ruth never imagined falling in love, especially after getting diagnosed with cancer. It all happened so quickly she never had time to really process the disease she had. Not until last year, when she fell in love with a boy and left him because she was scared of putting him through the worst. But one day, she was getting her regular dose of Chemo therapy one day when Lancaster was standing in front of her. Lancaster was practically drooling, and Ruth was dreaming of him.

Begin;
It was another day. Another day, being picked in the arm with a needle, feeling like I've been bitten by a mosquito. It was another day, seeing the same nurses with the same 'I don't want this job but I put a lot of years into it so suck it up' looks on their faces. Another day, with the bitter sweet, tangy smell of the cleaning water through the I.V. Another day feeling the cold, fresh liquid enter my arm, it almost hurts, everyday.
It's another day, another day. I don't want anymore days. But due to my calculations, there's two months left. I have also discussed the calculations with my doctor and he agrees they're correct. We have disregarded telling my mum.
My mum, she's a very emotional woman. Ever since I was diagnosed with Leukemia, she can't be in the same room as me without crying every five minutes. I'm surprised there aren't rivers by the time she leaves. Don't get me wrong, I get it, I'm her babygirl and I'm dying. But you know, I, myself, we're dying, and I don't cry like that. I guess we're just two completely different people, she's emotional, I'm not. There's not another way to put together how emotional she is.
My pap, he's a wonderful man. Always watching over me, always making sure I have what I need, always making sure I've eaten and taken care of myself everyday. Since mum started giving up on herself, pap doesn't want me to end up that way. I won't, but he won't risk it. He works eight hours a day, seven days a week. Some times, I go on into work with him, so that I'm not at home listening to mum cry as she goes through my baby pictures. Pap has quite an interesting job. He runs the warehouse dock for a trucking company, and I know, I know what you're thinking.
       'How's that cool?'
       It's cool because he runs everything, and that's a pretty big freakin deal if you ask me. He tells the truckers where to go, he decides what product the company is going to transport and which product they're going to trash. He decides who works on the docks with him and who doesn't. And that's, cool.
       Today, I wasn't going into work with him, sadly. Obviously, I had to go into the hospital for another round of chemo therapy. I don't enjoy it, obviously. It puts me into an abrupt mood, I become angry, sad, exhausted, depressed. I swear, the more and more I do this, I don't think the side effects are worth fighting for my life, honestly.
       I mean, I'm not trying to sound depressing or something you know. It's just that, I have nothing going for me. I don't have a boyfriend, I don't have a job, I don't travel, I don't do stuff at home, the most I'm doing is being in the presence of my mum, so that she can cry more.
       "How're you doin today sweetie?" My regular nurse, Angie, asked.
       "Well, you know, the norm. Still hating this place with every still-living cell in my body" I giggled, wincing as she pricked my arm to enter the water to flush my veins.
       "Gosh, make me feel more and more loved every time, hm? How's your mum?" Angie was the nurse in the room when I was diagnosed, the nurse that I cried on because my mom was to busy crying on my dads shoulder to see how I was. Angie, always reassured me it was because she loved me, and that's really tough news for a mum.
I know, Angie, I know.
       "She's the norm to, crying because I'm dying" I paused, "hey that rhymed!"
       "Oi, how many times do I tell you not to joke with me like that!" She laughed tapping my leg.  
       Angie, was like the older sibling I never had. I never let another nurse do my chemo for me. If Angie is scheduled off for one of my chemo days, she comes in just to do mine and then we go to the bookstore and get ice cream.
        "Ruthie, is it okay if someone shadows me today? I promise, he is very, very trustworthy. And I pre-warned him in case you said yes that you would not be a regular patient for him. That you are, my patient." She giggled rolling over to me on her wheelie chair.
       "If you say he's trustworthy, then I don't see why not, hm?" I was genuinely curious. Normally, Angie never lets anyone she's shadowing join.
       "Ah thank you ruthie, he's such a sweet boy" then she leaned over and whispered in my ear, "he's my nephew and he's single baby!" She whisper yelled in my ear. I giggled as she got up and brought him into the room.
       "G'day ma'am" the beautiful, gorgeous boy walked into the room.
       "G-good day mate" I smiled.
       Angie laughed and I glared at her. Everything that she did, the boy was watching her, very closely. Studying everything she did, as if he was actually interested unlike all the other studying nurses.
       "My names Lancaster, by the way. What's yours?" He smiles sitting beside me as Angie was readying my chemo.
       "M'names Ruth, Angie calls me Ruthie."
       "Beautiful name for a beautiful girl!" He cheekily smiled. As Lancaster has been in the room, I don't think I've seen him not smile.
       "Alright Ruthie, it's time" I sighed as Angie walk over to me and inserted the chemo. Almost instantly I felt the tightening in my arm and the numbness overcome my body. My nose scrunched up as the smell of the bitter sweet entered. My eyes became drowsy, as I knew I had another hour and a half.
       "I'll be back for you, Ruth." I heard from the beautiful boy as the door shut. Instantly, my eyes drooped shut.