Taste

His Absence

The room let off a hot aroma, or maybe it was the heat of my face. My hands were shaking, my heart was pounding. There was a constant stinging in my abdomen, in a place that had been stabbed. Blood was gushing around my fingertips, I could feel myself begin to slip away with each drop. It felt like I was being rung out like a wet towel; with every bit of force taking the life out of me.

Twisted Storms was standing above Cosimia, letting the knife stir in his hand. The silver metal had been smothered in blood, a bit of it dripping off of its sharp tip. Her whole body below him was seeming to turn gray, the life was lost out of her. She was lying on her side, magenta blood spilling everywhere, creating a pool of hot liquid around his feet. He was still, and curious, green eyes focused on the blood flow. Had he even the slightest bit of guilt within him?

In that moment, I realized that it was he who had stabbed me. It was he who had taken the life of Cosimia. But he was my partner, and he sure as hell held my heart. And as I stared at him through my fuzzy vision, I felt myself break. Love, I don't know if that's what it was, but now, it's damaged. Surely, I felt like crying, and I tried my hardest not to.

"What the hell have you done?" I yelled at him, hunched over, and blood running down my chin. The tears started running down my red cheeks, mixing in with the blood, and dropping in light scarlet droplets on the ground.

"I-" he turned, staring at me with shock in his face. There was pure manic in his cat-like green gaze, and I feared it. "Red, listen to me-"

"What are you thinking? I'm your partner you asshole!" I cried, sucking in a gasp of breath, and feeling my abdomen shriek in pain. Gasping, I sat down on the ground, bleeding everywhere.

"Come on, I'll get you to the Medical room, we'll fix this," he said, running towards me, ready to lift me off the ground. I scooted away before he could touch me.

"You think you can fix this?" I breathed, the blood salty on my lips. "You think it's gonna be all better after fixing me?"

"This women is an anihu, Red! An anihu. So what in the hell are you thinking, protecting the enemy we've been training to eradicate our entire lives?" Twisted Storms growled lowly, taking small steps closer to me, and with all of the pain I was in, I didn't move. He sighed, and looked down, moving the knife down to his side, away from me.

Slowly, without him noticing, I reached into my vest and pulled out my silver pistol. Tucking it behind me, below my lower back, I held it with the hand that supported my posture on the ground. My other hand was gripped tight onto my clothing, blood squeezing through the spaces between my fingers. My teeth were clenched as more and more waves of pain came from my abdomen, and began to start like fire throughout my body.

"Red, I love you," he told me softly, I looked up, seeing his eyes cloud with sorrow. Suddenly, from his grasp dropped the knife on the floor, with a plink. "Let's... pretend this never happened. Come with me, we'll run to a new village, and we can start a family, and we won't have to take their lives anymore."

"I can't, Twisted Storms," I sobbed, leaning forward a bit, my long hair around my face. "She's my mother, my real mother."

"That woman?" He asked, his eyes wide with disbelief. "There's no way. She's an anihu, don't you see that magenta blood?"

"That's what you don't understand!" I yelled, droplets of blood sputtering out of my mouth as I yelled. "Humans are our real enemy, we're the anihus!"

He furrowed his eyebrows, and began to shake his head. I knew that he wasn't believing a word I was saying, and I shivered with that  knowledge. All of the love I had for him was melting into a fear now, a fear that he would take my life. A fear that he would think I was going mad. Just a few moments ago, this man was my best friend, my love, my everything. And now, I couldn't hardly even look into his eyes.

I held the gun up. My fingers were sweating, my ears ringing. I felt completely numb. Everywhere.

"You're on my side, or you're not." The words came out of my mouth, without even thinking. A cold breath escaped my lips, I felt intensely focused on his every move, I was ready to kill him.

He stared at me, with the most terrified look I had ever seen. But it didn't phase me, I no longer cared. Something inside of me had taken over, something that was not showing mercy. Not today, and not ever. And for a while, with that adrenaline, I could hardly feel my stab.

Within his beautiful green eyes held a twinkle, a small murmur of love and affection. A single tear dropped from his cheek and to the ground, his lips quivering. He wanted to say something, but he wouldn't get the chance. In his heart, he knew that I was about to pull the trigger. And though he didn't want to die, though all he had to do was just let go, he didn't. Never would he give up his whole life, Twisted Storms is not someone to waste things. I knew him. Better than he maybe knew himself.

"Move," I ordered, pointing the gun up towards his head. His gaze didn't leave the floor. He couldn't bear to look me in the eyes.

"Move," I said again, feeling hot, streaming tears emerge from my eyes.

He didn't. Not even a little step.

"Damnit Twisted Storms! MOVE!" I screamed, my heart thudding so hard I could feel each pulse throughout my body. "Don't make me do this... I don't want to do this..."

"Kill me if you want, Red." His tone of voice was careless, I could hear him shrugging in his words. Then he looked up, his shaggy black hair draped over part of his left eye, his cheeks a bit pink. Rage began to grow in him, he clenched his fists a few times.

"Obviously," he paused, looking away for a moment, and then back into my eyes, now crying. "Obviously, I never mattered to you. Obviously, if you were given the chance to choose me or the enemy, you wouldn't choose me."

He sighed, and hung his head, I watched as tears dropped off of his face and onto the cold cement floor. "And- and if you won't choose me, I don't want to live anymore. If I mean nothing to you, then take my life."

I stared at him, not knowing what to do. Somehow I hadn't noticed, but my entire body was shaking. The gun was faltering in my hands, and I felt like turning it on myself. But then I stared back at Cosimia, just ahead of Twisted Storms. Her body, lying cold and lifeless on the ground, the essence of a true, beautiful anihu was gone. I couldn't die now, I had to get out of here.

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, my amber eyes focused back on my partner. Now sobbing, the knife plastered in blood beside his foot. My heart was breaking, I sobbed as I held the gun towards him, and closed my eyes.

"I love you, Twisted Storms,"

•••

I held the tree, feeling the bark with my fingertips, grasping it's power and strength. Once, I used to be like that, strong, and bold, in everyone's path. But now I was now better than a violet, hidden in the forest, away  from seeing eyes. My heart had never healed, and though I liked Cruzie, never would I love him like I loved Twisted Storms. And as he held me in his safe, loving arms, I couldn't help but feel guilty.

That every time he held me, I thought of my lost mate.

So at night, I would come here. In hopes that some miracle happened, and maybe, just maybe, he would be here.