A DEEP, DARK SECRET

"A DEEP, DARK SECRET"

A person who chooses his own child as a sexual object may nit necessarily be an abusive and uncaring alcoholic who lives in a familt with too little money and too many children.

Daddy and his little girl have a deep, dark secret. When mother is away from home or asleep, daady fondles his daughter behind closed doors and does other things he would not want others to know about. The name of their secret is INCEST.

INCEST is sexual activity between closely related family members. One researcher found that in most of the reported cases "the offender is an adult male, and the child victim, a female.. A study based on court cases involving incest offenses revealed that 90 percent of the cases concerned fathers and daughters, stepfathers and stepdaughters, and grandfathers and granddaughters. Of the remaining 10 percent, half were sexual relationships between fathers and sons."

Not only is there an almost universal taboo against incest, but sexual activity by adults with children is a crime. Yet incest seems to be affecting an alarming number of families. Manu children today are involved in an incestuous relationship.

What sort of person would choose his own child as a sexual object? Sandra Butler, a writer and researcher who spent a year interviewing members of incestuous families, says; "I had expected to find violent, alcoholic men — men who live in families with too little money and too many children, men who are abusive and uncaring.... I was wrong"

Supposing that incestuous assault occurred only in fragmented inner - city families and ingrown mountain communities, Butler found instead that these men came from a cross section of families. They were from all socioeconomic classes, men like those living on the street where she lived, sometimes men who were "upstanding pillars of their communities..."

Reasons for incest are as varied as the individuals who commit it. Some common characteristics frequently cited by authorities on the subject are: 1) feelings of frustration, hostility, insecurity and anger. 2) immaturity and lack of impulse control. 3) confusion of roles in which the child is seen as a substitute for someone else. 4) a tendency to abuse alcohol.

What sort of woman is the mother in an incestuous family? Some mothers have been described as "meek, withdrawn, and submissive to, and dependent on, their husbands." Others have had " a high rate of debilitating physical or mental problems." One woman whose husband was an alcoholic was forced to spend a lot of time away from home at her real estate job while her husband abused her daughter. Mothers sometimes realize that incest is happening and encourage or ignore iy; sometimes it comes as a complete surprise.