Stubborn Love.

Secret For The Mad.

I pulled up onto the driveway. Sat there with my hands gripped on the steering wheel for a few moments. I checked my phone after the text I'd just received.

'I heard you pull up. I'm inside with the kids. Adara's asleep but Ruby is traumatized.' I sighed and went inside. The bedroom light upstairs was on so Adara was clearly in the mosses basket.

"Hello." I called hanging up my coat, I went into the living room and hugged Erin. She sat back down on the sofa after handing me a cup of coffee. I sat down next to Ruby and pulled her into my side. We hugged each other. I put the coffee down on the table. She began crying. Erin smiled at me and stayed with me sitting on the sofa for some emotional support.

"Where's mummy?" Ruby sniffled.

"Tell me what happened. What did you see?"

"Well you unlocked the car, mummy got pulled away from us so I took Adara. You sat us in the car, mummy was screaming and crying. You were shouting. I heard the police cars. I saw Jay. Mummy reached out for Jay's hand when you turned round again I saw mummy get shot. She fell to the floor and Hank come over to us and protected us from everything."

"Well mummy is fine. She's had surgery but she's okay. Not awake yet." I smiled. She nodded and kissed my cheek before going up to bed. I sat there feeling pretty low. Erin put her hand on my leg and smiled warmly.

"Don't blame yourself Matt." She smiled.

"I'm okay. I miss her. You know what it's like when someone you love is hanging on for dear life." I sighed.

"Yeah but there is a big difference. It being your married with kids."

"Yeah and you were going through a tough point where you were about to get together again because you thought you were pregnant." I sighed. I held her hand as we were both getting emotional.

"Well clearly he is still in a bad place. Because he is refusing to leave your wife. They always have and always will have this love for each other. We both know this. They are always going to be like this. Like you said to him earlier. A couple days after your wedding she was in hospital with Jay even though we were together." She sighed. We finished our drinks and I saw her out. I went up into my bedroom and laid in my bed, Ruby was cuddling me and Adara was in the basket the other side of the bed.

*

I headed off to the hospital. For the 8th time in a row. I had got another call.

"Hello?"

"Erin where are you. Your needed at med."

"I'm coming Hank. What's up?"

"Your boyfriend's having a break down about Gabby in ICU." He sighed. I hung up as I parked. I ran in through the wards until I got to ICU. I took a breath as I went over to him. He was shaking, crying, rocking and mumbling.

"Jay listen to me babe. I love you I know you love Gabby but look at her Jay. She might not even survive. She's only alive now because she's on like 6 machines. Jay you need to come home, rest up and after your feeling better we can come back or maybe if I stay here tonight, you can stay with me. You can take a sleep on that sofa with me so we are still right next to Gabby. Okay?" I smiled, he nodded I sat on the sofa next to the window. He laid on it, resting his head on my lap. I smiled at Hank before he left us to it. I just carefully and gently ran my fingers through his hair.

* * *

"I'm so sorry about your not loss I guess but just how bad everything is going for you. You've been through a lot. You have been so strong. So please if you need me don't fret to contact me. You are so strong." Boden smiled.

"Thank you." I sighed.

"Matt. If you need me you know where I am." Kelly smiled, he hugged me before stepping back. I nodded and sighed. I adjusted Adara on my arm before Gabby's mum took her from me. Ruby squeezed my hand.

"Dad it's been 20 months. I think it's time to do this for real." She smiled.

"Indeed. Coming in with me or waiting out here with Boden and Kelly?"

"Waiting here." She smiled. I kissed her head, I took a deep breath and followed Will through to the room where she was. He opened the door and she was still peaceful. In a grey baggy top and tracksuit bottoms. The heart rate monitor was just averaging, all the machines told us everything was fine but we didn't know what was going on inside. I sat down in the armchair and held her hand ever so gently. Her index finger flinched when I touched her hand. Will checked the time and we both watched her carefully.

"Gabby if you can hear me squeeze my hand." I smiled. Nothing.

"Gabby if you can hear me please squeeze my hand." Again nothing.

"Gabby please come on. I love you." Finally she squeezed my hand only weakly but there was pressure there. After the pressure being on and off. She finally woke up. She didn't know what was going on and the worst part was she wasn't responsive. We shone a light on her eyes but she wasn't responsive at all. How did she go from responsive squeezing my hands to like this? We weren't too sure what had happened. Will gave her a small injection of something in her arm and she became more aware of everything. She was sat up looking around. She moved a bit awkwardly and grabbed her neck.

"What?" I smiled.

"That hurt...what are these? Dressings?" She sighed touching the dressings on her neck.

"1 year and 8 months ago. You were shot and you were dying on the floor in the car park out the front of this hospital." I smiled, she reached out and held my hand. Then mum come in with Ruby and Adara. Kelly and Boden stood at the back of the room.

*

I listened to everyone's conversation but I just felt so different about everything. There was a knock on the door and he walked in. He put flowers down on my bedside table and sat on the edge of the bed as if no one else was in the room but us both. I sat up as best as I could and hugged him.

"Jay..." I whispered.

"I've missed you.."

"I've missed you too. I miss my kids." I smiled. I sat back as Ruby climbed onto the bed and Adara was placed next to me. She was sitting up now.

"Well Ruby's 10 now and Adara's 2. They have grown up a lot since you last saw them." Matt laughed.

"Oh okay.." I sighed, for some reason my eyes glued back to Jay.