Inside My Head

Chapter One

If only I could tell them.

If only they could hear my voice.

They call me William, but they also call me other things. I just moved, transferred to a new school and I have no friends. Not that I had any friends at my last school. But things are different here. The faces are not as friendly, the hopes are not as high, and the students are not as successful. My family is broken, my friends, well, I have none.

My teachers have not forced me into grades or tests. They have not forced me into 'friends', who are students assigned to me to make me feel comfortable. No, they have not made them do that. I do not have students helpers, only adults. And this abnormal situation happens only to special students. Students incapable of a normal daily life at school. Students who are different.

Students who are disabled.

Chapter One

I walk into school, shuffling my feet, with my mom to the left of me. She opens the front door and I step through. I look around at the students, the hundred students walking the halls. I smell the slight stench the teens give off, due to how close the gym is from the main office. I rub my nose, look at my mom and we walk into the office. Two desks sit side by side. One with a name tag with the word Lucy and the other Meredith.

"Hi, we are looking for the principal," Mom pauses and looks down at the paper they sent us in the mail. "Principal Hi-ate?" She butchers his last name.

"Oh, yes," Lucy turns and points down a narrow hallway, headed to the back of the office. "Mr. Hyatt is back there, first door to your left."

"Thank you," Mom grabs my hand, and I hear her whisper "Hyatt" under her breath. We walk down the dimmed hallway to the last door on our left. A small gold bar titled Hyatt was pinned exactly in the middle of the door. My mom turns to me and runs her cold fingers through my sandy blonde hair. We make eye contact before she pulls me into a hug. "I love you," she tells me, and I know she is looking for a response deep down, but she does not expect one from me. She knocks on the door and footsteps come walking up. I watch the handle jiggle until the door is pulled open. A large man with a square face opens the door. My chin is forced up due to his height but his smile is very welcoming. He reaches out his arm and shakes hands with my mom. I analyze the man, his grey hair and bushy eyebrows to his polished black shoes. He reaches out his hand and I look at it(probably for a moment or two longer than I should have). Hesitantly, I begin to reach for the man's hand but my arm does not move. I feel my knee flinch but my arms stay to my side. I slightly sigh.

"Elvator-" I try my best to apologize but instead confuse him with my terrible speaking skills.

"He likes elevators..." My mom tells him almost seeming embarassed. I grab my left arm with my right hand and dig my nails into my skin. She lowers her voice as if I was not going to hear her and says, "William is a little...slow." I cringe. She does not know I understand. She does not know that I hear her. I release the grip on my arm and feel the indents my finger nails left. My mother looks down at my arms. "Will! Where is your jacket, I told you to-" She pauses realizing that she 'told me' to bring it. I heard her say it, but I did not want to do it. Even though she thinks I do not understand her. "He is partial nonverbal and does not comprehend most things. We try and put him in English classes and it has helped with some things, so we think he can understand basic sentences." She pauses and looks at me. "Move your head if you can hear me, Will." She tells me slowly. I nod. Mother turns back to the principal. "He cannot write, but he loves sports. He is fully capable of most activities that they will do in physical education. He loves peer helpers in PE, but is also good with teacher helpers. He doesn't talk much and we are not sure how well his hearing is. His comprehension level is low. He would probably be best off with an adult by his side, at least for a little while"