Wrong Number

4

my mum was finally asleep. I got up slowly and walked to the bathroom. I lifted the toilet seat and coughed up my food and threw it up. I flushed the toilet. When I was about to throw up a second time, I realized my I had woken my mum up and she heard me throw up. I looked up at her with tears running down both of my cheeks.

"Daniel! What's going on in here?!" She asked sounding worried.
"Uh.. nothing mum.."
"Dan we need to talk.. come sit next to me on the couch.. okay?" She got up and sat on the couch.
I got up to and followed her.

"Listen.. Dan.. what's wrong? You can tell me.." she said wrapping on arm around my shoulder.
I sat on her lap like I was a kid and cried on her shoulder. She rubbed my back gently.
"Mum.. I feel worthless.. and fat.. and ugly.. and when your not here.." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "Dad.. hits me.. hard.." then I pulled up my sleeve with the cuts on it and cried harder.
"Dan! That's not true! Your not worthless, or fat, or ugly! And I'm gonna talk to your dad about this dan. You don't deserve this." She Said holding me close.
"It will get better, I promise." She whispered into my ear, with a calm voice almost like Phil's.
And before I knew it,
I was asleep in my mums arms.

The next day I woke up feeling ill. I had a bad head ache and a cough. I got up from my sleeping mums lap and rubbed my head. I waked to my room and coughed hard. I looked at my self in the mirror. I looked terrible. I looked terrible if I was sick or not.

I sighed and grabbed my phone off my side table and checked my social media. I noticed I got a text 4 minutes ago from Phil asking if we can FaceTime.
I don't wanna facetime him when I look like this, but I wanna talk to him.
I replied with a simple "Okay" and then moments later I got a Factime from Phil. I answered it.
When he saw how sick I looked he immediately asked,
"Dan are you okay?"
"I'm okay.. I just feel really ill.." I smiled at him. When I talked to him all my pain faded for awhile.
"Oh. Well.. did you tell your mum?" He asked.
"Yes I did.. she said she will talk to my dad about it.. I hope everything gets better.. I don't know how much longer I can take this Phil.. it's to much pain.." I sighed.
"It will dan. I promise." He said smiling.
"Hey Phil I have a question."
"Yes dan?"
"Am I fat?" I showed him my full body in through the mirror.
"What!? No way! Your not fat at all Dan" he said with his soft voice.
I smiled. "Thank you. What about ugly? Am I ugly Phil?" I turned the camera around to my face.
"No way! Your not ugly either."
My smile grew.
"Thank you Phil. This makes me feel a lot better about how I look.." I Said.
"Anytime Dan. Well I gotta go eat breakfast, okay? I'll call you back later. Goodbye." Phil said hanging up.
I think I'm gonna eat breakfast too.
I ran to the kitchen and grabbed a box of cereal. I put some in a bowl then poured some milk. I started eating. I felt good for once.
But soon the happiness was soon shattered when my dad came in, and my mum was still asleep.
"Why are you eating you fat ass. You don't wanna gain more weight, Dan!" He said laughing.
I sighed and got up from my chair. And walked right back into my room.
I'm NEVER eating again.
EVER.

I looked in the mirror once again.
I am ugly.
I am fat.
I'm worthless.
A waste of space.
A disappointment.
What would my life be like if I never came out to my dad? Would he love me?