MISADVENTURES OF AN ALIEN(ATED) LANGUAGE TEACHER

Part 13

PART 13

I pondered aunt Flora's words for a while. I felt like Jon Snow of Game of Thrones, acting on instinct without really knowing what the hell I was into and what was actually happening around me. In other words, I was in the dark about many things concerning my own life, and you would be completely entitled to say to me: "You know nothing, Jon Snow."

"When was the last time you ate something?" aunt Flora asked me.

"I don't remember", I shook my head.

"Let me make you some sandwiches." She stood up and went to the kitchen.

I was thankful for her initiative: I was famished. While she was preparing food, I stood up, went to the window and drew back the curtains. (Yes, checking what floor I was on was becoming a habit by now.) I looked down and discovered we were at a dizzying height, the kind of height that will render you a jelly mass if you happen to fall down.

"What floor are we on?" I asked, pulling out from the window to calm down my vertigo.

"Sixtieth. Why?" shouted my aunt from the kitchen.

"Just curious", I shrugged.

I looked up and saw the sky: black velvet with sparkling stars like diamonds. The moon was high up. How was it possible? It had been early afternoon no more than an hour go! And then it dawned on me (well, it didn't literally dawn because we were in the middle of the night and morning was still far away. What I am using here is the other meaning of dawn. Ok, I'll give you this one for free, so that you don't have to look it up: dawn here means realize. Why didn't I just use realize? Where would the fun be in that? Oh, it's so great to have my teaching mode back!)

"We are in a different time zone, aren't we?" I said.

"Yes", my aunt admitted, bringing a tray with sandwiches and a glass of delicious orange juice.

I went back to the couch and sat down.

"Where are we, exactly?" I wanted to know.

"It's best if you ignore that. Eat up", she indicated the sandwiches.

"Come on, auntie! Don't you think I've been in the dark long enough?" I pressed her, grabbing a sandwich and eating it ravenously.

"Ok", she sighed, giving in. "We are in Norway."

"Norway! I'll be damned!" I exclaimed. I really needed to learn this teleporting thing!

"You know, for a language teacher, you swear a lot", she said with disgust.

"A language teacher has a friendly relationship with vocabulary, that includes swear words", I replied with pride. "I particularly like swear words because they give force to an utterance."

"They are shocking!" she argued.

"My point, exactly", I smiled.

"But if you overuse them, they lose effect", she countered.

"They don't seem to be losing effect on you, dear auntie", I laughed.

"It's good to hear you laugh again" she said.

"Yes, it feels good", and then I became serious again: "Please, finish the story", I asked her.

"What is there to finish?" she frowned.

She probably thought I had deduced the rest, but I hadn't, and Sherlock Holmes was in an unknown park far, far away and couldn't help me with this. So, I asked for clarification:

"What happened to my bibi? Was bi arrested for the photos? And what about mum and dad?"

"They questioned bim on the spot, but they let bim go. The pictures had clearly been taken from afar and there was no evidence of close contact or a conspiracy. They are all ok, but the police are watching them closely. A while later, they decided to go after you. They tracked you down, but there was nothing that demonstrated you had been involved with the bombing, so they didn't have grounds to arrest you directly. They were looking for a reason to bring you down and subject you to a forced interrogation, so they designed the loyalty test. If they could prove that you were friendlier towards humans than you were supposed to be, they would have you at their mercy."

"They almost did", I mused. "How could I be so foolish?"

"Don't beat yourself up with that, kiddo. They are very insidious and deviant. Besides, failing that test is another reason why you are at the top of our outcast list. You should be proud."

"Thank you, auntie. What will happen to me now?" I enquired.

"Well, the first thing I advise you to do is to take a long warm bath in my tub because you are a mess, and then I will call Charles to examine you. As soon as he says you are fit, you'll start your teleportation training with Bill. When you finish that, enough time will have passed for things with the secret police to cool down, and you will be able to resume your work. It will have to be in a new location, and with a new appearance and name, though. Does that suit you?"

"It suits me perfectly!" I smiled.

"Go on, then. Bathroom is that way", she indicated with her hand towards a corridor to the left of the kitchen.

I started towards the corridor and stopped for a moment:

"Ah... auntie?"

"Yes?"

"Do you happen to have some fresh clothes to lend me?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, frowning.

"Well, you know", I started, "with all the running, and consequential sweating, and then the lying on the ground business... these clothes are a bit..."

"What? You mean those are real clothes?" She was bewildered.

"Yes, of course they are real clothes... I..."

"Why on earth are you wearing real clothes? Why don't you just shift them together with your physical appearance?"

"Because I don't know how to do that. I didn't even know it was possible until I saw you do it a while ago", I confessed.

"That's preposterous! What do they teach you in undercity elementary school these days?"

"Not the useful things, apparently", I shrugged.

"Unbelievable", she shook her head.

"Maybe you should tell Bill to add that to my training", I suggested.

"That's a very bad idea. Bill knows nothing of fashion, dear. Just go and have your bath, and when you are finished, I'll teach you myself to materialize clothes on you."

"Thanks, auntie, that sounds great."

I had a very long bath, and then I had a lot of fun learning to clothe myself in different colours and styles with aunt Flora's guidance.