Stubborn Love.

Best Of The Worst Sides.

"Yep I start in 2 hours but I'm going to head straight away and gym for a little while." She laughed again, going into her bedroom and going to get changed I stood leaning against the door.

"Gym? Your starting that back up again." I laughed.

"Yep training with Matt." She smiled. In a blink she was dressed, she grabbed her bag and a bottle of energy drink. She hugged me, kissed my cheek and left.

*

I got to work 2 hours before my shift, I just went straight into the locker room and chucked my stuff in the locker. I went onto the engine floor and wrapped my hands up and started boxing with the punch bag that hung in front of the table. The table was there because it belonged to Squad. Squad was run by Kelly, and he had like 8 people on the squad truck. They were all sat there watching me box. I didn't care anyway. I had headphones in. I kept boxing until someone touched my arm. I jumped and turned round.

"Hi." Casey smiled.

"Hello!!" I laughed. I started walking back to the locker room, unwrapping my hands. He was behind me the whole way. I leant against my locker in my baggy top, leggings and new trainers. He smiled.

"You look good."

"You saw me literally 2 hours ago." I laughed. He stood closer to me and held my hands. I just smiled and didn't know how to react. He just kissed me. Like full on. I had no choice but to go with it. His body pressed up against mine against the locker. Just as I smiled against his lips. I heard footsteps so we both stepped away from each other and I continued to unwrap my hands. I looked up and saw Mill's stood there.

"I bought you lunch but I don't even think you need it anymore." He laughed, but you could tell it was a upset laugh. He chucked the box down on the bench and walked out. I grabbed the box and ran after him.

"Mills wait up." He turned round and smiled.

"What?" He was crying.

"I'm sorry about that."

"Let's forget about it yeah?" He smiled.

"You bought me noodles."

"Your favourite." He kissed my head again and just walked out. I was so angry with myself I stormed back into the locker room, finished getting changed and sat myself down on the sofa in the common room.

*

I got home and I felt angry. Why? I don't even know. Why was I angry because she was kissing someone else. It didn't even matter. I was tired of it all. I got on the phone to my mum straight away.

"Peter?"

"Mum? Can I come move in with you please?" I broke down completely.

"Of course you can? We shall come and pick you up in about 2 hours okay?" I got packing, I chucked all my stuff into 2 bags and just got on with preparing to move away. I took one last look around the apartment before jumping into a taxi to get to the train station.

*

"Ambo 61. Truck 51. Squad 3. House fire. 42nd street. North Avenue." I sighed, smiled at Shay as we jumped into the ambo and I began driving while she went on her phone. I wasn't too sure where I was going but I tried. I managed to get there eventually, the fire trucks behind us. There was a building fire. A house fire. There was no one outside so I'm the guessing the call came from inside the building meaning there was someone in there. Myself and Shay got the bed out and sorted. She stayed by the back of the ambo, I set out another triage bed on the floor next to the ambulance just in case. I watched as the fire crew got kitted up and took charge. Casey was walking about on his radio as Kelly took squad in there. Soon after Casey went in alone to catch up. I don't know why but I started getting really worried. I had my hand on my radio just ready and waiting to hear. Chief kept looking at me like he knew I was ready for the slightest noise or anything. I was terrified. Kelly came out carrying a young girl. He took her to Shay and she began sorting her out. A man walked out after with the help of Cruz. The whole of Squad were out now. I grabbed Kelly by the arm and pulled him closer to me.

"Where is Matt?" I was shaking even holding his hand.

"I didn't see him? Is he in there?" He looked at me genuinely concerned.

"Yes he was in there." I shouted, before I could turn round to face the door, the whole building blew and it flung us all to the floor. Rubble falling everywhere, flames even higher. I felt sick as I stood back up shakily, I got myself sorted out again.

"Casey? Report." Chief shouted through his radio. "Report Casey! Report!"

"Casey? Casey please answer me right now." I cried through the radio. Kelly held me gently as we waited nervously. The radio just crackled but nothing. He didn't say anything or do anything. I watched that door so carefully.

"Someone needs to go back in there and get him..." I got out like a whisper. Chief looked at Kelly and he looked at me.

"We're going." Kelly kissed my head and him and chief got kitted up before running in there. Shay had transferred the causalities to another ambo so she stood by my side as we all waited nervously for Casey to come out.

For 20 minutes we stood there, silence across everyone it was horrible. I got my radio tightly and something made me do it.

*

"Casey I don't know if you can hear me or not. I don't even know if your breathing but I am so sorry about earlier. I love you. I do love you. I have loved you for months. I was struggling. I feel sick right now. You better come out of here and hug me. Or even kiss me again. You better do this. You need to sort your self out. I love you Matt." The radio crackled among the noise from the creaking building. The flames were growing higher.

"You hearing that Matt. She loves you." I sighed, as I carried him over my shoulder as we started to make it down the stairs. Chief managed to get a hold of his radio.

"Gabby we're coming." He smiled.

*

Just as I heard it they all come out, Kelly carrying a burnt dirty Matt. I had to try so hard not to cry. He put him on the stretcher and I worked alongside Shay to get a line in.

"It won't go in his arm. It's too swollen."

"Do his leg." Shay smiled, I managed to get a line into his thigh and then I had to incubate, get a oxygen mask on. Shay got him on the back of ambo and within minutes we were driving to the hospital. I kept listening to the radio conversation so I could be updated. Matt was completely out for the count.

"Do we know what's happened?" Chief's voice echoed in the ambulance.

"Burns to one arm but it's not bad. He should be okay. Just got to give him chance to wake up."

"We'll be at hospital before you know it." Kelly sighed.

*

It didn't take long before we were sat in the hospital waiting room as a firehouse, no one had time to change so of course we were all covered in dirt and rubble, our skin died grey from the amount of smoke and clouds off the fire, we all stunk of whatever had been burning in there. Shay had her arm around me as my head rested on her shoulder while I cried. This was the most painful thing I'd been involved in. My shift ended 2 hours ago but I couldn't go home. I'd text Mills to explain the situation to him but he hadn't replied so I'm guessing he was asleep. Just as Kelly stood back. Will (the doctor that usually dealt with fire fighters call outs and medicals) came over. I sat up slightly, holding Shay's and chief's hands. He didn't even open his mouth but there was pain in his eyes. My heart broke right there and then. I didn't even have to say anything. I just looked at him, mouth open ready to talk but no words would come out. Nothing come out. I just sat there.

"I am so sorry." Were the only words I heard come out his mouth as my world broke right there and then.