so i'm kayla i am 20 years old and a addict, my addiction is to escape and i never accepted i was one till now, i went to my first aa meeting with a friend as her support listening to others and some of their stories really opens your eyes, my addicted has gone on for years and i never knew, it wasn't always drugs and alcohol those i only did once in a while, it was also cutting myself ,binging on food locking myself up skipping school just doing anything to escape, i had a terrible childhood i was the outcast in the family was in and out of group homes, my grandmother being my foster parent, in and out mom and dad, a lot of anger and violence abusive sisters and being a abuser to everyone around me the anger controlled me, i didn't have a lot of friends, was shy and angry a lot of times crying myself to sleep dreaming it would be over, the addiction got worse as i got older it started as isolation which turned to pill popping on what i could find when i was upset, moved to cutting, when i was 16 i started smoking and drinking more, soon i be going back to the unit high,soon that to turned to me trying new drugs from mdma to acid to ecstasy to speed, i was trying them all, and it helped for a few hours,but i still felt lonely and i wanted to escape none of them worked for long nor did alcohol and i still feel that way, alcohol was my stress reliever i didn't drink as often as a lot of addicts do but when i did i went full out drinking till i felt happy and numb sometimes only made it worst ,a few months ago i overdosed in front of my 9 year old niece, i overdosed on mdma and alcohol i also had weed in my system that night i scared not only myself but my niece and roommate, when i went to aa i realized my issues i also learnt not all addictions are the same,today i have been sober almost 2 weeks and i dream of a day i don't need those escapes, and i know it's going to be a struggle but i want to get there and i will get there. this is my story, and my story of a road to recovery
