Love, Scars, & Shooting Stars

Chapter Thirty-Three

Julie slammed the door shut behind her and paced an angry path back and forth through the center of the pint-sized apartment.

What gives him the right to judge me, or question my decisions regarding my son? she fumed silently, yanking the elastic from her ponytail and raking her hands through her hair. He might be my boss, but he's certainly not my keeper, and what I choose to do or not do with my child is none of his damn business!

Julie's eyes darted around the apartment, searching for something to break or throw or otherwise vent her frustrations on, but everything in sight belonged to Cameron. The dishes, the curtains, the furniture...all of it was his. And since her living here, not to mention her employment, was dependent upon his good grace—

He may as well own me, too, Julie concluded, the realization crashing down on her like a ton of bricks. Oh, my God! What have I gotten myself in to?

Julie flew to the bedroom that had been Finn's over the past few weeks and tore open the top drawer of the dresser. It hadn't been a conscious decision to save the garbage bag that had been her suitcase when she first arrived, but she was thankful for it now, because she couldn't allow herself to take a single thing more from Cameron Shepherd, not even a stupid Hefty bag! Julie snapped the bag open and began hurriedly tossing her and her son's clothes inside.

"You're leaving?"

Julie started, whirling around to find Cameron standing just outside the doorway of the tiny bedroom.

"Geez, don't you knock?" she growled, and then remembered that the apartment was his. "No, of course not—why would you?" She turned away again, slamming the now-empty top drawer shut before starting in on the next.

"Julie, come on," Cameron pleaded softly, stepping into the room. "Don't do this."

"I have to," she insisted, whipping around to face him. "I have to figure out what's right for me, and for my son, and I can't do that with you... confusing me! I don't need you judging me, or telling me what to do, or questioning how I raise my child! I don't need any of that, Cameron!" Julie sank wearily onto the edge of the twin bed, letting the bag of clothes slip from her grasp and fall to the ground between her feet. "I just don't need it."

Cameron crossed the room and sat beside her on the bed, her body listing toward his as the mattress sank under his weight. She scooted to the side just far enough for him to notice, but apparently not far enough. She could almost hear the snapping of the charged air between them, could feel the heat of his thigh near hers. He leaned forward with his forearms braced on his thighs and Julie stole a glance in his direction, noting the way his dark hair curled over the collar of his shirt. He didn't speak for a long moment, but she somehow knew that he would, and so she waited.

"You're right," he finally said. "You don't need that, from me or anyone else. But you've got to tell me what it is that you do need."

Julie snorted derisively.

"Where do I begin?" she asked, only half-joking.

"Right here," Cam said earnestly, turning to face her. "Tell me what you need right here, right now, in this moment."

Julie brought her gaze up to meet his and a hundred possibilities instantly flooded her mind. Some were less-than virtuous and others were downright wicked, but she managed to keep those to herself as she reached out and laid her hand gently over his.

"Right now, what I really need is a friend," she said, knowing that she wanted so much more than that. But it wouldn't be fair to ask him for more. Not now, while everything in her life was so suddenly uncertain.

Cameron nodded solemnly, turning his hand over to thread his fingers with hers.

"And?" he prompted.

"And I need you to understand about this thing with Garrett," she continued. "Or if you can't understand, at least don't make it harder for me than it already is."

"I can try," he vowed, tracing his thumb along the inside of her wrist. "Anything else?"

Julie sighed and tipped her head to rest lightly on his shoulder.

"Well... since you asked," she said, fighting against the lump in her throat. "I could really use a hug right about now..."

She felt him smile against the top of her head as he snaked an arm around to pull her in close, and Julie melted helplessly into the warmth of his embrace. Closing her eyes, she breathed in his scent—a heady amalgamation of soap, virility, and fresh-cut lumber—and everything that had been so wrong about her life only moments before suddenly seemed bearable.