Impossible

Self-Conclusion

Christians POV:

I couldn't remember ever enjoying myself so fully. I wasn't sure if it had to do with the fact that I had let myself go completely and became almost animalistic. Clutching his shoulders, clinging to him, struggling to get more of him, branding him with a kiss, letting passion consume me and lust motivate me. God, he looked good. Laying in the crook of his shoulder panting and sweaty I breathed him in, spice and soap. The unmistakeable scent of a man, it surrounded me, caressed me, and calmed me. It was easy to talk to Garret it had been since the very first time he text me. It was as if he absolutely refused to let there be an awkward moment and I was able to appreciate his blunt outlook and approach. He didn't appear to be pulling any punches. We discussed why we were both single, me telling him I just got out of a bad relationship. It registered in the farthest corners of  my mind that he was exceptionally good at evading questions, avoiding having to give indirect answers, and posessed the uncanny ability to shift my focus on one topic to another. I couldn't blame the guy for clinging to anonymity, it was part of his over all appeal. I didn't know what made him tick, I didn't know what made him so good in bed, I didn't know what gave him the right to walk around so sure of himself. Then again, I didn't want to. It was sexy as hell to meet a gu who just knew who he was, what he was about, and what he wanted. So he didn't do serious relationships. I could live with that wasn't like I was looking to get shacked up so when he finally asked me where I expected this to go I told him exactly what I wanted. "A boyfriend without the title." I didn't want the hassle of having to explain myself, the expecations of monagamy, the he-said/she-said. I just wanted to exist and co-exist. All the perks of a relationship I.E. someone to sleep with/next to, call when bored, go do fun things with, without all the drama of a titled relationship. My answer seemed to suit Garret fine, as he brough me in for another kiss grinning broadly and calling me pumpkin. For the first time in forever I was smiling, life wasn't so bad, and I had found an unlikely ally in Garret. Things were certainly beginning to look up so I snuggled closer into his chest, and began to let my body relax for the first time in ages. We talked until late into the night, both of us content to listen to each other breathe when the conversation lulled. Finally as I was about to drift off to sleep I felt him stir and reach for his cell phone. I buried my face in his side to keep from being blinded by the light of the phoen in my pitch black bedroom.As I lay there the first notes of his favorite song began to drift through the room filling me with a profound sense of awe that he could play a song so sad it complimented my own tragic existence the last few months. As I drifted off to sleep I felt him kiss my forehead. As The Spill Canvas played on I knew intuitively this man was going to change my life in som irrevocable earth shattering way.

Authors Note: I realize I switched point of views but this is a story very near and dear to my heart and I wanted to make sure I convedy exactly what Christian is feeling and thinking at this point. Garret is going to be the one to make everything better. And for the first time Chris finds hope in such a dismal situation!!!