What is depression?
Depression isn't loud.
It is silent.
It is deadly.
It is hate.
Sadness.
Anger.
Regret.
It's not just feeling down after a breakup, or a fight.
It's wanting to die because you feel like things will never get better.
It's wanting to drag blades across your frail skin because you want to pull the pain out of your body.
It's searing your flesh with a flame because you can't see any hope whatsoever.
It's crying without being able to breathe because you feel like the world hates you.
Loathes your existence.
It's laying in your bed, not wanting to move because you feel like it's not worth it.
It's starving yourself or making yourself sick because you hate your body.
It's looking in the mirror and wanting to smash it, using those shards to change who you are.
It's pushing everyone away because you feel like you are troublesome to be around.
It's hate.
It's sadness for days, weeks, MONTHS.
It's everyone else saying, "I thought she was happy, I loved her smile." To "Why didn't we see this coming?"
It's thinking that death will help everyone else so you won't bother them anymore.
It's not loving what you used to because you feel like life isn't worth living.
Depression?
It is silent.
It is not loud.
It is deadly.
Its driving down the road and wondering if driving on the wrong side of the road would matter.
If walking over the cliff side would be like flying.
If swinging was supposed to be in a seat or in a noose.
If laying on the tracks and feeling the wheels crush your bones was enough pain to distract you from the pain in your heart.
If life is even worth living if all you do is cry.
Depression is not loud.
Depression is silent.
