Stronger

You wouldn't believe me if I told you that I used to be a shy, quiet little girl back in my day. I would be scared to speak up or not say anything. I would also be one of those girls that if you upset me I would keep my hurt feelings inside, but you wouldn't know it. I used to think that I was a follower, and I never thought that I could be a leader or even inspire someone.

Carrie was one of my best childhood friends that I had growing up. We had known each other since we were babies. She wasn't only my friend, but a family member, and my confidant. Over the years, I would sleep over at her house and we would have blast together when we were children. When we were teenagers, things had started to change. Carrie was starting to grow up way too fast. Well, she had to because she saw her mother die from cancer when she was 14 years old. She had struggled and I went to her. I thought that me being there for Carrie would let her know that I cared for her and that she was loved. Apparently, that wasn't enough.

When I was 16 years old, the distance grew between me and Carrie. She wasn't the same Carrie that I knew before. She was glued to the computer and was talking to some guy she just met online, and thought she was in love. It lasted for some time. Carrie begged me to not say anything to my family about the guy she met online. I kept her promise.

Fast forward, I was 17 years old. I learned that Carrie had betrayed me and she used me. During my vacation time with my family, I knew something wasn't right and something very bad was about to happen. Little did I know that I find out that my beloved grandfather had passed away. My family had to head back home and host his funeral for him.

During that time, I felt lost, and confused. I mourned over my grandfather and I was angry at Carrie for using and manipulating me to get what she wanted. It was a terrible year. I felt depressed and for months, I had suicidal thoughts. Whenever I went into the kitchen and saw those knives, I used to think about taking out that knife and cutting my wrists open, watching myself bleed out. I even felt numb. I couldn't feel a single thing. Though I had one thing, it was faith.

Towards the end of my junior year of high school, I began to see the light. Since then, I had been happier and became successful ever since. I became a stronger person because of this experience alone. I have seen myself grow from the inside and I realized that I was worth something and I had a purpose in life.