Nandito kami ngayon nakatayo sa balcony ng bahay niya. He hosted an after production party in his house and every crews, co-stars, everyone who helped our movie happened were here kanina. The party just ended and kami na lang ang naiwan.
I'm wearing a black jacket with white top under and a maong pants so hindi ako bothered sa lamig and also I have my glass of red wine in my hand. Siya naman, he's wearing white polo semi long sleeves and pants.
Kanina pa kami dito nagkkwentuhan, actually he do all the talking because i dont talk much right now which it so not me kaya i know that he knows there's something wrong. Nakatingin lang ako sa mga puno sa tapat namin and they f***ingly look peaceful kaya nakakainggit,hayyy sana yung utak at puso ko din. Siya naman, i know sumusulyap din siya saken with his hands intertwined, alam kong he's bothered, hindi na rin siya nagsasalita kaya sobrang tahimik na.
But he needs to know this, nahihirapan nakong itago. My thoughts are killing me. I have to take the risk.
"Fuck!" i suddenly said which is kinagulat naming dalawa.
"What's wrong?!" hinarap niya ako sa kanya and i can see that he is worried, well sino bang hindi eh parang tanga lang yung ginawa ko.
Pwede akong magsinungaling, sabihin ko lang na nakagat ako ng langgam o di kaya may nakalimutan ako kuno o may naalala ako. Pwede akong magsinungaling pero alam kong mas pahihirapan ko lang sarili ko.
This should be done. Whatever happens, tatawanan ko na lang o tatakbo na lang ako palabas ng bahay niya. Joke lang pero shems huhu ang tagal ko ng nakapause dito.
Pero this is it. I took a very deep breath, look him in the eyes. And i took a deep breath again. Alam kong mahirap sabihin to pero mas mahirap pala kapag actual na.
"NasiCR ako!!" Nagulat siya sa sinabi ko at ako din, nagulat din ako sa sinabi ko.
Meron talagang mga times sa buhay natin na sobrang mabwibwisit tayo sa sarili natin at isa sa times na yun sa buhay ko ay ngayon.
Pero joke lang yan. Heto talaga ang sinabi ko.
"I am in love with you James."
There, I said it.
Wow, I feel relieved. He is just staring at me and hindi ko mabasa kung ano nasa isip niya but i can say na he dont look surprised.
What should i do next? Should I run? or tumalon na lang kaya ako dito pababa.
"Thats why you were avoiding me."
Yes, I've been avoiding him for weeks. Kapag may shooting kami, umuuwi ako agad. Hindi na rin ako nakikihang-out sa kanya. Hindi ko na rin siya masyadong kinakausap kasi nga ang hirap makipag-usap sa taong mahal mo pero kailangan mong magkunwari na di mo mahal.
Kapag magkasama kami sa scenes nadadala ako sa mga sweet scenes. Sinasabi nga ni direk na ang ganda daw ng chemistry namin, natural na natural ang dating. Sabi pa niya nakakatulong daw talaga kapag magkaibigan in real life. Sasagot pa tong si Ken na kasi daw "Bestfriends for life kami".
Hindi ito yung una naming movie, actually pangalawa nato. Nung una naming movie is success which is two years ago. Actually, we were like M.U. that time like malandiang usapan. We initially thought we were in love because of the intensity of the movie, we were madly in love with each other in the movie kaya siguro feel namin kami din in real life.
I was being careful, i dont want to jump in a relationship na walang foundation and also, im scared. Parang we just met eh, feel ko ganun kami. Ayoko ng laro,siguro dahil sa relationships ko before kaya i chose to be careful this time. So i ended the M.U. thing. He's not into it nung una but we became friends after. Good friends. Then i guested in his t.v. series and we became closer than before and now, were bestfriends.
And you know where i am at now, I fell in love. He is a great guy. A family-oriented guy. A Very very sweet guy who is too sweet for the world. And also, a very smart one. He also like dogs! He have seven! He is also cool but sensitive to the feelings of others. He donates to charities. A good talker. Not a womanizer, definitely not. He respects women. There's a lot of things that you would love about him and now you know why. He is one of a kind.
"yeah" i said "But i dont expect you to say something okay" pinilit kong tumawa "i just want you to know" lies. Pwede bang hindi mag-expect. I almost had him but I left. Ang tanga ko talaga.
He is just staring at the trees right now.
"James, alis nako ah. Sorry." pinipilit ko lang talaga na hindi maging worst ng sobra to. Medyo nafefeel ko na yung sisi kung bakit ko pa sinabi. Sobrang tanga ko lang. Dapat naghintay na lang ako na matapos yung premier ng movie.
"Let's settle this." He finally said. "Hindi pwedeng matapos tong araw na to na hindi ka okay." he looked at me. I remain silent, ano bang dapat kong sabihin. Sobrang pinipigilan ko yung luha ko.
"You said you love me, is it romantically? or just bestfriends love?" He asked smiling.
What the fu**, is he for real?
"Are you stupid now? It wouldnt be this hard to tell if its not ro--"
"Okay sorry hahaha, i kinda want assurance." he said laughing. "Thank God you come into your senses!" then he hugged me. Medyo di ko pa nagegets ang nangyayari pero kinikilig nako. Shems. Hugging him felt home. I feel so happy kahit di ko pa gets.
"What are you doing?" i asked, mahirap na baka heto yung way niya ng rejection.
He looked at me "Remember the day we became just friends after you broke me..." natawa ako sa sinabi niya, siya din naman "that time, i was sure that I love you, I never felt that way with any woman i am ever with. I never felt that assurance before. I never stop loving you, and now, I love you even more Nadine."
End(?)
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Yehey, after ilang years! lol! Thank you for reading! GodBless. Pls let me know what you think about this oneshot. Nega o Positive comment, g lang! Mwah
Yung title pala, konti lang kinalaman sa story lol!
