The Heart Thaws In Its Own Time (Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanoff)

Chapter 7 - Reaching Out

Natasha pushed the old barn door open and regretted it immediately. Clint was using a foul-smelling chemical stripper on an old painted door and the smell contents of the entire barn were trying to push their way past her. "Sorry about that, should've warned you," Clint said, glancing back at her. He put down his towel and blade and moved towards her. "I gotta get outta here and take a break," he said. They walked out into the fresh air.

"What's wrong?" Clint asked.

She stayed quiet, looking out in the distance. She was happy to be back at Clint's house but something didn't feel right.

"You scared, Nat?" he asked.

"I'm not looking forward to whatever is next, if that's what you mean," she said.

"It's been nearly two months. I think this one shook you up more than I've ever seen before." he stated matter of factly.

Natasha looked out over the field nearby and concentrated on the warm breeze hitting her face and moving her hair. "Can't explain it," she admitted. "I've read every book and magazine in your house, taken a million walks... I'm getting a little bored," she looked at him, "no offense."

Clint laughed. "But...?" he prodded.

"But I don't know why I can't seem to get myself to get back to work or to the way things were... or to move on to something different. Maybe it's being considered a fugitive by the government," she admitted. "Fury's been asking me to jump on a couple of things..."

"Maybe it's not that you're afraid to go back to," Clint said and walked away towards the house. He knew exactly what he was talking about, even if she didn't. He knew walking away would drive her crazier than staying and finishing that thought. "You gotta get back on the horse!" he yelled without turning around.

Natasha loved Clint like a brother. And he could certainly drive her nuts like a brother.

Ah, shit... shit, shit... I think he's talking about Steve, she thought to herself. Shit, he's talking about Steve, isn't he? How the hell does he know? He's like a freaking mind-reader, that one. ...Get back on THE HORSE? She felt her cheeks get warm.

She dug her phone out of the pocket of her jeans and took a quick look. The only messages were older ones which she had not returned. She knew how awful that must have felt to the other teammates but she couldn't bear opening up and answering questions to everyone.

Her last message from Steve... it stared her down more than the others. Steve was an amazing friend and he deserved something more from her. He had accepted her when she didn't even think she was worthy of his acceptance. She thought about the last night they spent together in the hotel room and how when he woke her up that morning, she wanted nothing more than to kiss him right then and there. She started typing.

"Hey, Pal. It's been a while. Just wanted to say hello. And I'm sorry. So sorry."

She put her phone back in her pocket, she wasn't expecting an answer anytime soon. With nothing else to do, she started to walk towards the woods. She figured she might as well take a walk. The thick September air made her skin feel sticky but the shade of the trees would help.

She stopped after a little while of walking and looked at her phone. There was nothing. It hasn't been that long since I sent him the message, she reminded herself. I probably blew it anyway. What am I going to do without Steve?

The rest of the day passed by much the same. By dinnertime, she was beginning to have the thought that she may have ruined their friendship permanently by not getting back to him. She tried to ignore the feeling that washed over her all day long. It felt a lot like death.

After the kids went to get ready for bed, while the sun was getting orange and low in the sky, Laura, Clint, and Natasha sat on the front porch with some beers and talked. Natasha tried not to be distracted but her mind was elsewhere.

"Nat?" Laura called out to her. "I was wondering if I could ask you a favor?"

"Yeah, sure," Natasha snapped to.

"I hate to ask..." Laura hesitated, "would you mind babysitting sometime soon? It's just that there isn't really anyone we feel safe leaving the kids with..."

"I would love to," Natasha answered. "Big plans?"

"Not really," she laughed. "I'd be happy to catch a movie and a bite to eat. We could just really use a date night."

Clint went inside to make sure that Cooper and Lila were getting into bed. He was barely on the other side of the door when Natasha's phone chimed. Natasha recognized that chime...

Apparently, so did Clint because he remarked "Ohhhh Steve!" in a high voice. Natasha looked at Laura who was smiling. Natasha wanted to make a smart remark about Clint but Laura's smile was just the encouragement she needed to ignore him. She felt a little butterfly in her stomach as she picked her phone up.

Steve: What? You're not going to call me "old man" anymore?

Natasha smiled. I guess he's not upset with me...

Natasha: Okay, old man

Steve: Hey, I'm not too old to give you a run for your money!

She laughed. This was the sillier side of Steve.

Natasha: You have to find me first.

Steve: Sounds like a challenge.

Natasha: Miss you, pal.

Steve: You okay, Nat?

Natasha: I will be.

Steve: I'm glad to hear it. Been worried about you.

Natasha: You wouldn't be YOU if you didn't.

Steve: It's hard to shrug over a text...

Natasha thought he was being pretty adorable and she wanted to keep the banter up but she thought it best to not seem too eager so she closed for the night. After all, it's hard to take the spy out of a spy.

Natasha: Well Rogers, I'm turning in for the night.

Steve: Take care, Nat. Don't stay away so long next time.

Natasha: I won't, I promise.

Natasha put her phone down and smiled to herself. She'd forgotten Laura was sitting just a few feet away.

"Well, I'm headed to bed," Natasha sighed.

"I see how it is," Laura ribbed her, "you're gonna hold out on me."

Natasha flashed her a smile and headed to the guest room.

The next day, Steve and Natasha exchanged a few more messages and she found herself glued to her phone, waiting to see if he'd respond and what he would say. In fact, the next week was much of the same. Back and forth, waiting for responses, sighing comfortably and happily when a message came...

You've still got it bad for him, girl, she thought.