Hey there guys.
I just had things on my mind, and where better to rant too?
This chapter will jump everywhere, from subject to subject, as I think of all the things bouncing around in my head.
So I apologise in advance.
Let's get started.
Here are a couple of things I'm talking about; my friend, moving, friends in general, my health, something a bit more personal.
Starting with my friend. Let's call him Fred.
So Fred is having a rough time with his (now) ex. She's a bitch and just mind fucked the shit out of him all the time. No remorse. Like, everyone I know who knows him doesn't like her one bit because of all the shit we find out that happens between them. She gave him black eyes, she was texting other guys behind his back and when he found out said that it was 'to show him what it felt like' (he done that to his gf before that (years ago)) and not even 2 hours after breaking up she was at another guy's house in his bed.
Now, when Fred found that out, he went over to her house to talk (he is a major sucker) and then she screamed that she 'never loved him anyway' in his face (after a pregnancy scare, which she would have kept apparently) and then he picked her up and they had a punch on in her front yard. A full on punch on. I know of 6 girls, myself included, who would have done that for him.
Now was that wrong of him?
Now don't get me wrong, I don't condone hitting women. Violence against women is disgusting.
But from my stand point, she deserved it. As I heard, she gave back what was given. Everyone who knows about their situation is torn about it. They hate that he hit her but she didn't not deserve it. It's very hard, and a touchy subject.
Next one, moving!!
I'm moving within the next month from where I live now, up to Queensland where the rest of my extended family lives. It's 2 states away so it's a bit move but we need to do it. A lot of crap has happened (I'll explain a bit later in the chapter) which just piles up and fucks us over again and again.
Anyway me and my family are moving and I'm very excited about it. But I'm extremely sad, because that means that my time with my friends down here is limited to a month at most. They don't really know at the moment. I'm trying to organise a time for us to get together and to tell them, but they're all busy with their own lives.
Speaking of friends with their own lives and the real reason I started this chapter,
I feel like all my friends are too busy for me. I get that it's not hard at all to forget that I'm here, I don't go to school with them anymore. I dropped out with expectations of keeping in contact with a lot of people, and now I'm friends with maybe 7 people at most? That says something, considering that when I was at school I could barely walk around a corner without hugging someone I knew. I had friends in lower grades that I love but I have no idea how to talk to without being at school.
My friends now are in their last year of school and as I'm moving soon I want to be selfish and steal their time but I can't. They need to focus because it's the most important time of their lives. Yet I'm still wary and feel like I'm being purposefully excluded.
Am I just worrying for nothing? Am I over reacting? Or should I be worried because we used to talk every night and now we barely talk once every 2 - 3 weeks? I just don't know anymore.
Now, my health. An unfortunate subject any time of the year.
So recently I've gotten sick. Nothing too serious, just a cold coming on. But what's worrying is the effect this cold has on my stomach.
I'll eat something but I'll get full fast and after a while I'll feel sick, like puking. That feeling will stay with me for a while. A few hours at least. And then I'll get hungry like I haven't eaten all day. And then repeat. This has been happening for a couple of days now.
Should I be genuinely worried? Should I go to the doctor? I was going to go the other day, but then I was feeling fine, or at least better, when I woke up.
Maybe I'm just being a slight hypochondriac.
Now something more personal is the reason I'm moving. It's about my family.
My Aunty died on the 2nd of January (happy new year!) and while my family and I were up in Queensland for the funeral my father left us. He walked away saying that he's had enough of us and that he doesn't need us.
He came back and my mum accepted him back. But then again my 'father' just up and left around my brother's 2nd birthday, a couple of months later.
Then around the same time, the guy that my mum got into a car/bike accident with came over and started threatening us because we were broke and made a $100 'good faith' payment, which was all we could afford with my mum not working and looking after 2 kids under 7 y/o, me working but on minimum shifts and my older sister's left over money after paying her own medical bills and such, but it wasn't enough money for him. So we had to go to the police station more then once for that lovely visit.
My father tried coming back, but mum wouldn't let him because this wasn't the first time he tried walking out. Then he flipped after finding out about this car accident guy saying that he 'has to protect his mother because he knows where she lives' even though this guy is threatening to harm his ex wife and 4 children not his mother.
Plus he kept saying that he's going to take my younger siblings away from my mum, so she went into hyper drive thinking that will happen, and we went to court and got a restraining order against him, which is now currently effective. We had a court date last month but the court adjourned/postponed the outcome on grounds of mediation (which according to a lawyer, with his and his family's past, won't happen). Now we have another court date coming up this week or next week to find out the results for sure.
Meanwhile, before the order was in place, he kept coming by and demanding everything he made (which, as a carpenter who lived with my mum for 20+ years, was about 2 thirds of our furniture) and anything he brought (with my mum's money, might I add, as he flat-out refused to work for a year and a half before he left). I most of our furniture was gone, but we've slowly brought replacements for them.
And then, after the order was put into place we had police knock on our door and tell us to contact a Detective from the city. We did, and it turns out that the people who we brought the house we currently live in off of, are being charged with Fraud. They scammed millions of dollars off of first home owners, like us. And because we can't pay the summary that the bank wants us to pay, we're in the process of losing our house. Which is really fun.
The one main thing we have to look out for is the reaction of my 'father' when he finds out we moved. He is mentally unstable and refuses to go to the doctors for any sort of help for it so we have no idea what he would and will do. It's a really daunting thing to have on your mind.
Well then, as my hour and a half rant comes to a close and I realise it's 1 am already, I'm beat. I've been working a lot for the past 2 months and I'm happy about it and also I'm over working. Working 5 days a week for around 2 months straight in retail will suck the life out of you.
I'm not sure who read all of this, and if you did, thank you for sticking with it for this long.
So my lovelies, you know should know the drill.
As Always
Don't be afraid to punch the post button on that comment.
And I'll see you guys in the next post.
Stay Crazy, Buh-byyyyyyeeee 😎
