Just Another Memory

Prologue

Prologue

If falling in love means ending up hurt, I could risk it. But love ending? It's the greatest pain a heart could bear.

"Ryden!" pasigaw kong tawag sa kanya nang makita ko siya sa wakas.

Nakatayo siya sa gitna ng kalsada habang umuulan, walang pakealam kahit pa nababasa na siya. Kunsabagay, ganun na talaga siya ever since we met. Bold, unpredictable, reckless...Lagi siyang pinuno ng sarili niyang buhay. No one could stop him of what he does. No one could make him cover himself if he wants to face things head on. No one could control him.

"Ryden!" Ngayon ay patakbo na akong lumalapit sa kanya habang isinisigaw ang pangalan niya.

He remains standing there, eyes boring into me as I go nearer. I could feel it as I go nearer. His dark self revealing itself to me, shooting through my very veins. His eyes dark, stares intent, not blinking despite the cold waters running down his face. His jaw is well defined while it clenches, as if his teeth are gritting inside. His hands are both in a fist as his arms slightly tremble from the cold.

It was this feeling. It was this same feeling that first day I met him.

Naramdaman ko ang takot na gumagapang sa katawan ko. Takot na kumakain na ngayon sa buong sistema ko. Definitely, it is fear, pero ayoko at hindi ko kayang tanggapin.

Pumunta ako ng Italy two months ago para sa isang International Painting Competiton. Hindi ako nagdalawang-isip na i-grab ang opportunity na iyon dahil talagang mahal ko ang pagpipinta. Ayos lang din naman kay Ryden dahil araw-araw naman kaming makakapag-Facetime. At sa yaman niya, he could probably visit me any day he wants.

Hanggang sa nawalan na lang ako bigla ng contact sa kanya since three weeks ago. Kaya kahit na dapat ay next week pa ang uwi ko, nagmamadali akong umuwi ngayon.

"R-Ryden..." Tumigil ako sa harapan niya at hinayaan siyang sumilong sa payong ko. Mataman kong tinitigan pabalik ang maiitim niyang mga mata. "Umuwi na t-tayo."

Ayokong umiyak sa harapan niya. Ayoko kaya pinigilan ko ang mga hikbing nag-aambang lumabas sa bibig ko.

Nang hindi siya gumalaw mula sa kinatatayuan ay nasagad na ako.

"Ryden anuba?!!" hiyaw ko. "Ano bang problema mo?!"

My frustrations reached their limits. Pakiramdam ko ay wala siyang planong magsalita o gumalaw man lang o kahit ano.

"Ryden please..." Fudge, I'm crying! "P-Pagod ako. I just went home from Italy. I got off a plane and..and I have a jetlag so I need to rest. Pero k-kasi, I missed you so much...I missed you so, so much kaya i-ikaw agad yung pinuntahan ko. I went to your condo, to your mansion, to school...you weren't there! So I went here! Kaya lang hindi ko alam kung anong nangyayari sayo! Please! Please, let's go home and talk.."

Lumakas ang ulan. Sa langit ay nakikita ko ang lalong pagkapal ng ulap at lalong pagdilim niyon. Marahil ay dahil maliban sa ulan, naghahati na rin ngayon ang langit sa hapon at gabi.

Or maybe not. Maybe the clouds are simply...grieving with me.

Binitawan ko ang payong na hawak ko at hinayaan na iyong tangayin ng hangin. Hinayaan ko ang sarili kong mabasa ng ulan kasama niya. Inabot ko ang mga kamay ni Ryden. Sandali kong pinaglaro ang mga iyon sa sarili kong mga daliri habang sabay naming dinarama ang lamig na dulot ng tubig-ulan sa aming mga katawan. Ang aking mga mata ay pinanatili ko sa aming magkahawak na mga kamay.

Fine.

Okay, fine.

He wants to stay here until midnight? Pagbibigyan ko siya. He wants to get soaked in the rain hanggang sa bumigay ang mga katawan namin? Fine! Whatever he wants!

"Let's break up."

I froze as my chest ached sa unang tatlong salitang narinig ko sa kanya for these three weeks.

No...no! I said whatever he wants but not this! I cannot tolerate this one!

Awtomatikong dumapo ang kanang kamay ko sa kaliwang pisngi niya. Kumalas na iyon sa kanina lamang ay magkakasalikop naming mga palad.

"Why didn't you contact me?!" I shouted, demanding an answer.

But he didn't answer. For as long as he remained standing there, now he started walking away, his back turned to me, as if the three words he told me are all that was left to be said between us, nothing more.

I watched his back while he was walking away, trying to look back on all the memories we've had before this day. Memories that will soon be forgotten.

Because as the cold rain washes away the tears pouring down from my eyes, my heart died with the memories.