Unexplainable [Original Version]

[chapter twenty-four: "like a fuckin' drum"]

"I will, man. You and Joli have fun!"

"Will do!"

I sit down the phone once Kev ends the call on his end. I release a heavy sigh before slowly making my way out of my bedroom and down the hall to Cody's room. I carefully peak open his door, so that I can check on him; he's still sound asleep. The biggest of grins comes onto my face as I watch my son sleep; I've made so many bad choices in my life and I've fucked a lot of things up, but Cody? He's perfect.

After I close the door to Cody's room, I head back into mine. I go to my connected bathroom and once I'm done there, I go back and sit on my bed. God, it's early, but it'll still probably be a bit before Cody wakes up. Should I go ahead and try to fix some breakfast for us? I mean, I don't want to finish everything super early and have it be cold when he's ready to eat.

I want to try and get back to sleep, but there's no point in that. As soon as I'd get comfortable, Codster would probably be up and runnin'. Might as well kill some time, right?

I turn on my television and make myself comfortable in bed. I'll just lay around for about an hour and then go start cooking. That's a good plan.

I'm no more than fifteen minutes into a show when my phone rings again. I catch it as soon as it starts ringing.

"Hello?"

"Scott?" Joli, babe? "Hey, are you busy right now?"

"Nah, not at all. I'm just waiting for a little more time to pass before Cody gets up. What's up?"

"Can I talk to you for a little bit? I mean, shit, it's a weird thing to really talk about but..." Joli trails off and sighs.

"Is Kev there?"

"He's gone to pick up some shit from the store; we're going out to this big lake near his place later and he wanted to get a few things before we left." Joli chuckles nervously. "Fuck, I don't even know how to start this."

"Just start at the beginning. Say whatever you need to say. You know I'm always here for you, doll face." I grin, but I can't shake these feelings of anticipation and dread that have washed over me. Let's see how this goes.

"All right... So, yesterday, Kev took me on this beautiful ride out in the country. I rode a four wheeler for the first time ever. That's pretty damn fun, you know?" I can't help but laugh.

"It's nice! The wind in your hair, the fresh air in your lungs..."

"Right?" Joli giggles. "It was great." She then takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment; when she begins talking again, there's this tone of uncertainty in her voice. "Kev took me up on top of this hill and we had a long talk. I'm... I don't know what to do, Scott."

"What did you two talk about?" I ask cautiously, as if I don't know.

"Kev told me that he loves me and I told him that I love him, too." A piece of my heart breaks, hearing her say that. "But, Scott... I love you, too."

Without taking a single moment to think, I reply, "I love you too, Jolene. Goddamn, I love you, too." The second those words fall from my lips, it's as if a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I've finally told Joli how I feel about her.

The line goes nearly silent for a moment, the only thing proving to me that she's not hung up being the sound of Joli breathing. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do. But, I've got to do something.

"I know you're scared of having a relationship again. I know you're scared of getting hurt. The choice is yours, Joli; I just hope you know that Kev and I are nothing like Thomas. We both genuinely do love you and will do anything that we can for you."