How Not To

The Tea p1

The truth is I never got  over you. Imma be honest ... you were my everything.  I was happy , truly, and genuinely happy. Or so i thought.  What we had was something new to me, something  O never experienced before.  I was warned about guys like you . But i didnt care,  the thing is , I thought I was in love and I truly believed I was. At the time I didnt know what love was, I still dont. You told me your were different,  that you wouldnt do me how u did your exes.  The funny thing is I actually fell for it . I thought you loved me but all you really wanted was attention. Today I read our old messages. I smiled as usally, eveything was so good. But then I slowly started to cry what was wrong with me. You were always there in the back of my mind . It was like you were always with me, even not in person.
 Its crazy how many feelings you can have for one person.All that ever was, all that we ever were. A distant ,stupid memory. I told myself I  was over you . Over and over again. Finally being  over that one person is like when your drowing. Someone comes and rescues you , you  finally get to take a deep breath  when your above water.the panic is gone , you can breathe, no more tears, no more hurt. Thats like getting over someone . Of course I still miss him . But its a little less everyday. I miss his smile that would make my whole day better. I miss his laugh that would make me die of laughter because he sounded so stupid. I miss his hair that i would try and braid . His hugs that would make me feel like there was nothing else in the world and most importantly when he held me it felt like I was safe and protected. Especially since i was going through a really hard time.  Like I said I still miss him. Even through everything hes put me through , he was with me through out a lot of more stuff. Its crazy how someone that was stranger came so close to my heart and it once again a stranger. It was for the better ,all in all.