My Beloved Raine

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Oh, my sweet, beloved Raine.

I can still picture it. That beautiful, tender smile of yours. You always had the most beautiful, most peculiar face I've ever seen. The way you giggled, laughed, running my fingers up and down your cheeks. That was, well, heaven.

You were my beloved Raine. From that one fateful night we met, to the day you died in the hands of that monster.

I'm sorry, Raine. I'm sorry I did nothing to help you. I was right there with you, a sobbing mess trapped in chains. I always looked at you through the window, but I doubt you ever saw me. I tried to make a sound, but I couldn't. I tried, but I couldn't: That monster took away my voice.

I think. . .If I had tried hard enough, you'd be alive, and I'd be dead. This same thought keeps me awake every night. It would've been better that way: You alive, me dead. Of course, the much more preferred outcome would be both of us survivng. But, you remember that monster, don't you? Every single scenario that plays in my head ends with either me or you dead. I bet you could've thought of better scenarios. You were the smilier of us.

What surprised me, was that you stopped pleading so soon. I was rooting for you, I really was. I never stopped pleading: I would cry, I would kick, punch, and even throw myself against the wall to keep him away from me. I would beg and bargain with him, yet he was relentless. All of the horrifying things he did to you, Raine, he did to me. So I knew how you felt, and yet you stopped pleading so quickly. I don't know if you were stronger than me, or because you broke down much faster, but seeing you so quiet, felt like the worst torture.

The first torture, and the last. You took them so differently. When you first saw the monster, I remember your eyes. Scared, horrified. You shrieked out of pure shock, this animalistic-type shriek, not even a scream. I could tell, I could tell the moster liked it. I felt so bad for you, even when I was the one suffering.

"Let Raine go, please. Please, just take me. I can't stand seeing her hurt like this. Just take me instead, please."

That's what I would have said, shouted even, if I still had my voice. I lost count of the cuts and bruises. It takes a very special kind of monster to do what he did to you. The first time he cut you, you yelled so loud, cursing at him to the worst degree. And the last time, when he threatened to cut off your head, you looked him straight in the eye. I mean, you actually had that in you. and you said, "Go ahead."

It broke my heart.

Then, you escaped. I saw you darting into the woods, and I was cheering you on. I was hoping you would get out safely, and find someone who'd bring the monster down. But then I saw him, with a rifle in his hands. I tried to warn you somehow, but nothing swayed the monster's evil will. He took one shot, just one.

I hope your death was easy, though I highly doubt it. From what I can tell, the monster shot you through the lung, and that was the end. Not for me, I was getting all of the attention now.

But, eventually he stopped coming. I don't know why. First, it would be one or two days. But now, it has been twelve, and he still hasn't come. I got out of my shackles, and I'm preparing to take that beast down. I'm in his house, clutching the same rifle he killed you with, Raine. I'm writing this so everyone will know what happened to us. Everyone has to know.

When the monster returns, I'll be ready, waiting for him. I'll put a bullet through his head, for everything he did to you.

My beloved Raine, I promise you. I will end this monster. Take care now, I hope you like it in heaven. You were always an angel to me, so if there is a God, I'm willing to bet he has a pair of real angel wings waiting for you. I don't need those wings. I just want to see you wear them.

That'd be enough. That would be all I need.

Yours, now forever and always.

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